BMF'S FOOD COLUMN!

Ho ho ho, Christmas is upon us which can only mean one thing…. TURKEY! I think not. I have a serious hatred for turkey and all things turkey related. I can hear you all shouting abuse at me , but listen to my reasoning first OK? Turkeys are so god dam cute for a start, I love the way they gobble and also, my little brother was mounted by a horny turkey which just makes me love them even more! A turkey tastes like a watered down chicken gone wrong and WHY OH WHY would anyone eat turkey when you could eat a BEEF WELLINGTON! That is why I will be providing alternative recipes for that all important Christmas lunch. This recipe is also dedicated to a very special lady, the universities founder and leader Dr.Pied Piper (don't get mad but I am changing the recipe as I have provided alternatives at the bottom!)


Ingredients

A seriously good, well hung 1kg Piece of beef fillet( Aberdeen Angus is dam tasty but a personal favourite of mine is Kobe, mainly because the cows have so much fun being massaged before they die)

3 tbsp olive oil

250g chestnut and wild mushrooms

50g butter

1 large sprig fresh thyme

100ml dry white wine (PM, refrain from drinking it all before it goes in to the recipe!)

12 slices prosciutto

500g pack puff pastry ( There is NO shame in buying it these days! I mean, seriously, have you tried making your own?? It takes days!!)

A little flour, for dusting

2 egg yolks( need I say, they must be free range? No didn't think so!)

Method, also known as the SILVIA way.

Set the oven to 220C/fan 200C/gas 7. Sit the beef on a roasting tray, brush (I like to massage the oil in with my hands because I love the feel of a nice, soft, well rounded….) with 1 tbsp olive oil and season with pepper, then roast for 15 mins for medium-rare or 20 mins for medium( NO ONE SHOULD EAT BEEF MEDIUM,DAM IT ALWAYS RARE!!). When the beef is cooked to your liking, remove from the oven to cool, then chill in the fridge for about 20 mins.

Instead of twiddling your thumbs while the beef cools, I suggest you begin chopping the mushrooms as finely as possible so they have the texture of coarse breadcrumbs. You can use a food processor to do this, but make sure you pulse-chop the mushrooms so they don't become a slurry.

Let 2 tbsp of the oil and the butter heat up in a large pan and fry the mushrooms on a medium heat, with the thyme sprig, for about 10 mins stirring often, until you have a softened mixture. Season the mushroom mixture, pour over the wine and cook for about 10 mins until all the wine has been absorbed.

Very often, the mixture is still too wet( Yes I get the dirty innuendo, Booker don't get too excited!) after this amount of time so keep evaporating until it holds its shape when stirred. Remove the mushroom duxelle from the pan to cool and discard the thyme. Overlap two pieces of cling film over a large chopping board. Lay the prosciutto on the cling film, slightly overlapping, in a double row. Spread half the duxelles over the prosciutto, then sit the fillet on it and spread the remaining duxelles over. Use the cling film's edges to draw the prosciutto around the fillet, then roll it into a sausage shape, twisting the ends of cling film to tighten it as you go. Chill the fillet while you roll out the pastry.

If you really can't be bothered to measure the pastry with a ruler like me, then just role out a huge square of pastry and whack the beef in the middle, minus the cling film!

Apparently, this is considered the fun part of the dish, where you wrap the beef up like a christmas present. I personally think eating it is funner!Glaze all over with egg yolk and, using the back of a knife, mark the beef Wellington with long diagonal lines taking care not to cut into the pastry. Chill for at least 30 mins and up to 24 hrs. Heat oven to 200C/fan 180C/gas 6. Brush the Wellington with a little more egg yolk and cook until golden and crisp - 20-25 mins for medium-rare beef, 30 mins for medium( don't bother cooking this dish if you have your beef medium!). Allow to stand for 10 mins before serving in thick slices.

Now Dr.Piper and I have had many discussions about beef wellingtons and as alternative fillings, we suggest using blue cheese or liver spread although blue cheese is a winner in my books!