BMF'S FIRST TIME

I remember my first time like it was yesterday.. I was 16 and had one too many glasses of wine. My friend James was over and one thing led to another…..just kidding ladies, I was not planning on telling you about my actual first time!

So how is it that little old BMF came across Pepsi??

On the 22nd May 2009, I woke up at 7am to begin revision for my animal conservation exam the next day. I had only looked through half the lectures so needed this day to do some serious last minute cramming. I always get distracted on the internet and that day was no exception so I went on to you tube to look at a clip from the L word. Instead I found a clip which showed a montage of lesbian moments in films and television. I was about to turn it off when I saw two INCREDIBLY HOT WOMEN rolling around together in bed. I nearly had a heart attack when I saw them together and it took me 1 hour to find out their names, the name of the show they were in and as soon as I stumbled across Pepsi English…that was it.

I spent 12 hours watching and re-watching every single clip and by the time I realised I had not done any revision for my exam, it was too late. I fell in love with Silvia when she started laughing about the guy with the "culo al aire" and took Pepa to see the stars. The more I watched her, the more I loved her. I had never seen such incredible acting in my life. Of course after watching Marian in LHDP, I wanted more more more, so I watched every film she has ever been in as well as numerous interviews.

I woke up the next morning completely under prepared and failed my exam with an impressive score of 38%. Considering I usually do pretty dam well in exams, that was a surprise. What makes me laugh to this day is the fact I was so happy I had found Pepa and Silvia, that I did not give a tiny rats ass about the exam even though it counted towards my degree!

So once I had immersed myself in Pepsi land, I found the random flores link and started to read all her amazing re-caps. I then found the LJ community and began reading all the wonderful stories as well as making awesome friends like Junebuggy, my mistress. Reading the fan fiction,made me want to start writing, which I have never done in my life so I began my own journal. This is when I coined my username, BigMarianFan. The long version of my name did not stick around for long and someone (I cant remember who) began calling me BMF which I kind of liked!

I found the AE community a lot later and popped my head out to say high just before the season finale aired and my beloved Silvia had her last breath. I didn't really post again for a couple of months as I went traveling to Morrocco and was actually really, really upset about Silvia's death. It had such a profound effect on me, I was heartbroken. When I did post again, Axon was the first lady I spoke to and she made a joke about being a blonde magnet. It took me a while to find my place on the thread but I think I have found it now. Who would of thought that I would become a lecturer at one of the most prestigious universities, get engaged, join the hunt to kill El Gordo, and much much more.

I love all of you AE ladies and do you know why? Because I can talk to you and share with you my love for Pepsi. All my friends thought and still think I am a complete weirdo. They don't understand how their "straight friend" (although now I am referred to as something quite different) can be so obsessed with a "shitty spanish lezza show" as one of them so kindly put it. What all my friends don't understand is that I fell in love with Pepsi because they showed me that it's possible to fall in love with and have an amazing relationship with a woman. Pepsi made me realise that I was not as straight as I thought I was or forced myself to be. More importantly, Pepsi led me to the AE community which has become my new addiction . I feel so lucky to have found so many woman who are not only intelligent, witty and compassionate, but who also share my love for two of the greatest lesbian characters in TV history. Pepsi and the empire we have built has changed my life for the better and I am so goddamn happy that I did not revise that day, failed my exam, but made an amazing discovery.

Piper's Note:

BMF blazed into AE like a shooting star - and immediately earned the love and obsession of a few good ladies, and some very weird ones as well.  But it was not her blonde pictures, her growing fan club, or her love of libations that earned her a place at PepSi University.  It was her amazing culinary skills.  To this date, only BMF had to go through an entire imaginary interview process which she passed with flying colors and flying bras.  Her weekly Food Column has become a staple (no pun intended) of our little blog, and she has always, always, managed to incorporate PepSi into whatever cuisine she was writing about. The imaginary PepSi University has been brightened and made more real by BMF. Personally, I am very thankful for her dedication to PepSi U, and I am glad to call her a friend whom I can drunk-blackberry with if and when I need to.  Muchas gracias, mujer!

THE I OF WE

When you are in love, it is very hard to hide your true feelings. Little things become big things. A gesture, a look, a touch--it all becomes heightened when you are trying to hide your feelings.

Being in love means that you want to write her name on every bridge in your hometown. You see her everywhere you go. You smell her. You see her smile. Songs become love songs when they used to be just....songs.

What if you have fallen in love with a co-worker? What if you are secretly sleeping together and trying to steal time? What if one of you is at ease with being a lesbian and the other is experiencing her first lesbian love affair?

If you are Silvia Castro you are dealing with a range of emotions. Being involved with Pepa is like Dorothy stepping onto the land of Oz. Silvia knew her life only in black and white and now her world is vibrant with colors she had only imagined.

So she wants to take it slow. She wants to keep Pepa a secret. Revealing the truth will be a shock to members of her family and to her colleagues. But most of all, revealing the truth means that Silvia faces who or what she is. She is a beautiful and successful woman who has only been with men, and yet she has fallen for Pepa. Big time.

There are two scenes to discuss in this lecture. First, Pepa and Silvia are at a crime scene and Pepa shows her a photo of a house that they can borrow for the weekend.

Silvia tells Pepa that she has dinner plans with her father, but she will make up a story to get out of it and be with Pepa. It is obvious that Pepa doesn't like this solution and Silvia is quite of herself for coming up with a convincing lie. There is a significant moment in this scene when Pepa touches Silvia's face and Silvia whispers "don't touch me"--as there are people around them and no one knows about their relationship.

No me sobes

The second scene is the next day when Silvia finds Pepa at Cachis, as she is looking for Paco (by the way, this is a busy episode for Silvia. She has great scenes with Salgado and Mariano, as well). She asks Pepa if she is upset about what she had said in their previous conversation and Pepa tells Silvia that she was right--she shouldn't have touched her in public. But she doesn't like the fact that Silvia feels she has to lie in order to spend time with Pepa.

Silvia says that Pepa is free to tell anyone in her life about them, but she cannot meddle in Silvia's life. Pepa immediately tells Julian and the customers that she and Silvia are together...Silvia's face is priceless.

Pepa then tells Paco (who already knows thanks to a keyhole in his house--the infamous bathroom scene where they just stared at each other's bras and sang Chicki Chicki--and no sex happened). Not only does Pepa tell Paco, she also kisses Silvia. Silvia is fighting back a smile and doesn't seem angry by this outing, maybe just irritated. And Pepa doesn't care, she is having the time of her life.

This is exactly why Silvia loves Pepa. Pepa takes her out of her controlled enviroment. And as scary as it can be, Silvia loves the thrill of a Pepa Ride.

And the moment, the moment that made my jaw drop and then cheer this outrageous show....the moment that I asked myself why can't American TV be like this this? With a smile on her face, Silvia gives Pepa the finger and Pepa gives her a wonderful air kiss.

The title of this lecture comes from being a secret couple:

    
     What are you doing this weekend? We...I... am going to the beach.

     Where are you going for the holiday? We..I... am visiting my family.

We catch ourselves. The world doesn't know that you are part of a couple. The world doesn't know that you don't sleep alone. The world doesn't know that you long to hold her hand as you cross the street. The world doesn't know that you know how she washes her hair and that her pajamas don't match. The world doesn't know a thing. And so the we becomes an I. Just an I.

Someday you will know when you are ready. When it is safe. We all need a Pepa to nudge us and we all need a Silvia to protect us. It is a glorious moment in your life, when you can say "we". You will become part of a "we". Then you can take her hand, brush the hair from her face and point to a bridge and say "look, our names."

Dr. Booker

Por amor al arte

I have to admit I am a (very) late PepSi fan. Yes, I know it's sad to say but I am a post episode 104 follower. And it was by a very, very random coincidence that I found them, so I should consider myself lucky to be part of the PeSiverse now.

I lived in Glasgow, Scotland, until June this year - right until Graduation Day. My best friend in G-town was Patricia, a crazy, sweet blonde from Zaragoza, who loved Los Hombres de Paco. I was always around in her house for dinner and movies, and she watched the show regularly, but I always chose to watch something else because I was never too fond of the stupid cop storyline. I had seen some pre-Pepa episodes when I was in Spain and didn't particularly like them either. She knew about PepSi all that time and never told me, and I would have never found out if I had not come back home for the summer.

I was mid-July 2009. I was on MSN with this girl (no need for details here) and we were sending each other Youtube links of songs we liked. She eventually sent me a link to a Pepsi music video, with the song Por amor al arte by Iván Guevara (link here). The chorus of the song goes:

Y apareció en tu vida la chica de tus sueños
a cubrirte esa herida y ella curó tu infierno,
que aunque tú no sabías que aunque nacieras princesa
no querías un Rome, esperabas a Julieta.
Nadie supo explicarte porqué la querías,
que el "hombre" de tu vida se llamaba María.
Pero escúchame, amiga, si ella también quiere amarte
no hay que darle más vueltas, no sé, por amor al arte.

[And the girl of your dreams appeared in your life
to heal your wounds and your hell.
Because you didn't know that even if you were born a princess
you didn't want a Romeo, you were waiting for Juliet.
Nobody managed to explain to you why you loved her,
or why the "man" of your life was called María.
But listen to me, my friend, if she wants to love you back
don't even think about it twice, just for the love of art]

Since I did not know the PepSi story at the time, when I listened to the song, I linked it to my own story (my first gf also happened to be called María). As I got involved in the PepSiverse, I realized that the song made total sense - Silvia's hellish life and her discovery, and well, Pepa's Sunday name is also María (José) after all. I think I might have watched the whole PepsiEnglish compilation in just one sitting. I didn't need the subtitles, of course, so whenever I saw something that didn't go, I wrote it down (professional de-formation, as we Spaniards call it). It was summer, it was hot, I was jobless and I had nothing better to do - that's my excuse.

That is how the whole thing began. A smart ass correction on Dr Piper's translation of the Save Silvia Campaign article in El País earned me my DPep and the Head of Translation Dept chair. Now I'm very glad I joined - thanks to PepSi, I have met brilliant people and I'm back on track building a career in translation.

Dr Bekelauer

Piper's Note:
The last is certainly not the least - Beke's contribution to Pepsi University has been immense and her translations have been priceless.  People wouldn't know how hard she works - but she has already completed translating the first season with Silvia (before Pepa), and has signed on for the coming's season's translations.  Personally, I am proud to call Beke my friend and because of her age (23), my adopted daughter whom I care for deeply.

Dazed & Confused

I had 2 first times with PepSi.

It was the morning of August 9, 2008 when I first discovered Pepa and Silvia on a YouTube video. I remember that day because it was the weekend after my younger sister’s birthday. I remember waking up that morning and immediately turning on my computer. I planned to only check my email but I ended up heading to AfterEllen and then going on the ever-so addicting YouTube.

I was looking for a lesbian movie or television series that I never discovered yet. I stumbled upon an author’s YouTube video that compiled her Top Lesbian film couples. One of the couples was a brief clip of a brunette and redhead:


My immediate thought: I was intrigued to know what this movie or television show was but I didn’t spend a lot of time thinking about it because I was wrapped around another discovery: South of Nowhere and the lesbian pairing of Spashley (Spencer and Ashley).

I don’t understand why South of Nowhere caught my attention more. If I compared the clips now, I'd be left scratching my head!!

But in December 2008, it was announced that South of Nowhere was ending after 3 seasons. I’ll always keep South of Nowhere close to my heart because of the self-discovery and innocence that was portrayed by Spencer and Ashley. But I was back to where I was in the summer of 2008: searching for another lesbian show.

It was December 24, 2008 and I was at work. In fact, I was the only person working in my department that day. With all this unsupervised time, I decided to do some research on AE, after all that was where I found 90% of my lesbian films/television shows such as Imagine You & Me, GirlTrash! and D.E.B.S.

I came across the website’s main article of the day: “AfterEllen.com 2008 Visibility Awards”.

I scrolled through the awards until I halted at Best Scripted TV Series with Lesbian/Bi Characters (International). I thought the screen cap of the couple seemed familiar but I couldn’t place them.
I ended up reading the forum that was originally called “Lesbian and Bisexual Characters Pepa and Silvia” or most of the day (it was only about 4-5 pages at the time!!). I couldn’t log into YouTube because my company blocks videos so I was left desperately waiting for 2pm to head home.

When I finally got home, I quickly went to YouTube and typed in my search. I stumbled upon a video that had a partial PepSi scene. It was the Undercover Stripper Operation, it started with the redhead and brunette wearing lingerie and wielding handguns. I didn’t have the luxury of Random_Flores’ recaps or PepSiEnglish’s subtitles so I didn’t know what was going on or understand what was being said.

It wasn’t the sensual Spanish language or the scantily clad females that captivated me. It was the unspoken look they shared. Silvia had given her partner a look of uncertainly mixed with fear, as if to show Pepa her anxiety as they had just completed this bust. But Pepa’s sly grin and wink of reassurance were enough to settle the Pelirroja’s nerves. Pepa was telling Silvia that they were okay, she was here to help her, to protect her. I remember shivering.


I thought to myself, how could one look write a novel? How could 60 seconds be able to touch my soul?

I knew there was a history to these characters that I wanted to learn. But it had to come at a later time because my older sister practically had to drag me away from my computer so we wouldn’t miss Christmas Eve dinner with the rest of the family.

I soon found myself planning around my personal schedule just to get my PepSi fill. I was wasting countless hours at work catching up on the AE forum, reading the latest fanfiction and learning to read and speak Spanish.

Who knew a University would be created after these characters? Or a virus called BMF fever would momentarily side track the forum? Or better yet, a group of avid lovers coming together to keep the spirit of Pepa and Silvia alive?

I was sucked into a world that still leaves me dazed and confused.

Daisy the Cow’s note:
Mola! Moo, moo, moo, moo Pepa moo Silvia!!

Piper's Note:
Angie005, MPep, was a lot of firsts: first student of Pepsi University, first to be awarded its MPep (complete with a virtual diploma, ceremony, and acceptance speech), first lead in Pepsi U's production of PepSide Story, first Pepsi Thesis I read, our first graduate student, and first person to bring her cow on campus.  On a personal note, Angie was the first person I've emailed with, and hers is the first fan fiction I've ever read.  I am really thankful to call her a friend when I am not Dr. Piper, I value her wisdom, diplomacy, and hockey prowess. Technically and amazingly, Angie005, MPep, is one of the founding lesbians of PepSi University.

Silvialogy 4x06

LHDP 4x06

By Dr. Pied Piper
(with translations and smart ass comments by Dr. Bekelauer)

(If you want to watch the episode without downloading it, the link is at the end of the post)

Everyone is gathered around the police scanner to monitor the riot situation at the prison.  If you listen closely to the voice over the scanner, the 2nd voice is Quique, the 3rd is Pove, and the 4th is Silvia
 

[On the radio]
Policeman 1: Inform us of the situation in the courtyard. I repeat. Inform us of the situation in the courtyard. Over.
Policeman 2: Delta 4 speaking. There’s no way to stop the riot, we need back up, we need external back up. There’s no way to control the riot. I ask for permission to use the water cannons [Translator's Note: It’s actually not water cannons, but “real fire” that he wants to use, but I can’t find a technical equivalent]. Over.
Policeman 3: Omega speaking. From my position I can see two inmates lying on the floor, they could be dead, you hear me? There are two inmates lying unconscious on the floor, they could be dead. Over.
Policeman 1: Please, identify the corpses.

Policeman 3: It’s impossible to identify the corpses at this very moment. Wait, it looks like… yes. One of them is tall and thin, the other one is smaller… He’s wearing glasses. Over and out.
Policeman 1: I repeat. Delta 4 and Omega, keep your position…

Rita, with Sabinica in her arms, starts shaking her head, as if doing so could ensure that Pove is not the casualty. Paco goes to console her.

Paco: Rita, eh, eh, Rita… [Rita shakes her head, starts to cry]. Let’s calm down, all right? Everybody stay calm. Those corpses are neither Lucas nor Povedilla, is that clear? [they nod, not convinced]

In prison, Pove and company are in a labyrinth while Allison Morris and Orlando Bloom-look-alike are in a rig checking their marauder's map to guide them out.  Actually, they're tracking the fugitives from their laptops.  (Borrowed from Mr. and Mrs. Smith?) And since I'd rather look at Pepa and Silvia than Pove and Lucas, only PepSi caps will appear throughout this lecture. 

Back at the station, Rita is getting more upset with what she hears from the police scanner.

[Still on the radio]

Policeman 3: ... I can see two inmates, they’re apparently dead. I need anti-riot units, you hear me? I need more anti-riot units. This is turning very ugly…
Rita: [crying] It’s all my fault… I begged you to please let him go back to jail, it’s all my fault.
Paco: Calm down, it’s all right, stay calm, honey.
Rita: And if they kill him, I have to stay calm too? And if it’s been all my fault, I have to stay calm too? Mariano…
Paco: Rita, honey, Povedilla is not one of those corpses, I swear. He was with Lucas, I swear.

[Translator's reminder: Rita grabs Paco by the lapels – her character, let’s all remember, is from Murcia! Everything in her is Murcian!]

Rita: You swear?? And when we buried him in that grave, it wasn’t him either? And when he got the boob job, it wasn’t him either? And when the butcher almost kills him, it wasn’t him either? What the fuck are you telling me???? FUCK YOU!!! I tell you… go fuck yourself!!!

Translator's Note:

I love Rita (Neus Sanz) because she can be the most hilarious character ever, as well as the thickest and the sweetest – all in one. There’s one thing that the international community misses in translation, and it’s the fact that Rita is supposed to be from Murcia (a small town, but province capital in the south of Spain) and that affects everything she does, her character (like in 4x02 when she snapped at Silvia for "stealing her baby") and the way she speaks (she has the thickest accent in the whole precinct and I think it’s hard to understand her for those who speak little Spanish – it renders her even more hilarious).

She has to pretend her accent because, because she is from the north (i.e., Sitges which is part of Catalunya, and the name Neus is Catalan for "snow"), so hands down to her awesome diction – Murtian (pronounced like Martian) is rather difficult to “perform”, especially when yelling or speaking fast. She does great most of the time.

HOWEVER, in this scene, when she yells at Paco, she misses the accent several times (you can tell because she ‘hisses’ a lot and uses the S properly – Murtians don’t), so you can tell this scene was shot carelessly – IMO, it should have been re-shot. I don’t think anyone else in the Spanish audience would complain, but you can tell she changes the accent.

Paco asks Dr. Shrink to help Rita when his phone rings. It's Pepa!

Paco: Hello?
Pepa: Hello, good evening. I’m sorry to bother you so late, but today I received a phone call from this number and it got cut off.
Paco: Well, I’m sorry, señorita, but I haven’t phoned anyone.
Pepa: Paco, is that you?

Sara dreams of Lucas teaching her how to frisk. Then they start frisking. It's a sexual dream and she wakes up and ponders her singlehood.  In the labyrinth, the dumbasses are still maneuvering to get out and Allison Morris is still guiding them.

At the comisaria, DL is getting ready to give his deposition. Silvia is in the interrogation room with him to check his sugar.

Silvia: Calm down, eh?

Uriarte's Attorney: I hope this is not just a pantomime to avoid prison for health reasons. (Piper's sarcasm: ASSHOLE!)

DL's Attorney: Captain Castro is under medical treatment because for his diabetes. […] He has been in the prison infirmary already.

Also in the interrogation room are the judge lady, Portillo, Uriarte's cute but asshole lawyer, DL's lawyer, and the stenographer. Watching outside are Paco and Montoya. Am I the only one who thinks judge lady is hot in a motherly kind of way?

Lola walks in to join Paco.

Paco: Honey, what are you doing here?
Lola: What do you think I’m doing, Paco? Supporting my father. Paco, he’s wearing handcuffs just like a common criminal.
Paco: Aitor, I want you to stick to the radio. When you know anything about the riot, you come here and tell us.
Montoya: Paco, did it start already?
Paco: They’re about to.

Judge: In your last statement you rejected your right to have a lawyer and also rejected to appeal against protective custody. Can you tell me what has changed since that statement was taken?
Don Lorenzo: That day… That day was horrible… Specially down in the cells. I was confused…
Uriarte's Attorney: You said that you shot Miss Montalbán, but you didn’t do it on self-defense. That is a first degree homicide. However, now you’re saying you were confused.
Don Lorenzo: Have you ever witnessed how everything around you turns into a blood bath, and felt that you could have avoided all the pain and suffering if you had not let yourself be fooled? You don’t know what it is, do you? So then I guess you don’t know what feeling I’m talking about…
Uriarte's Attorney: Lawyer, may you please remind your defendant that this is an interrogation of the Ministerio Fiscal and so I am the one who asks the questions.
DL's Attorney: Lorenzo, please.
Uriarte's Attorney: Thank you very much. Good. Let’s begin. In your statement, you admitted that you had a relationship with Miss Montalbán.

Lola: He’s against him, Paco, he only wants to get him!

Paco: Calm down, honey. Your father is very clever and very evasive, he’s like an eel (Translator's Note: In Spanish, “escurridizo” means both “evasive” and “slippery”, so then the eel image).

Uriarte's Attorney: I guess you had sexual intercourse. [Translator's snarky comment: What kind of a creepy question is that??]
Don Lorenzo: You guess correctly.
Paco: Gonzalo, if you want, you can wait outside. When it’s over, I’ll tell you everything.
Uriarte's Attorney: Correct me if I’m wrong. Your daughter, Inspector Silvia Castro León… isn’t she pretty much the same age as Miss Montalbán was? [Translator's comment: He’s getting creepier by the minute!]
Lola: What does it matter to him if my dad and Ruth consummated or not?
Don Lorenzo: She was exactly one year younger.
Uriarte's Attorney: Right.

Quique and Curtis bring a sleeping Rita to the lab - Dr. Shrink gave her some valium. Mariano is taking care of Sabinica. Back at the interrogation room, Attorney Asshole continues his questioning.

Uriarte's Attorney: Afterwards, Miss Montalbán began a relationship with Inspector Montoya, is that correct?
Don Lorenzo: Yes.
Uriarte's Attorney: At that time, Montoya was your right-hand man, your natural successor.
Don Lorenzo: He was. And he will still be.
Paco: Good job, Don Lorenzo.

UA: And if he was your right-hand man, did you not think of warning him about Miss Montalbán, who after all had already cheated on you twice
Lola: Oh my God, where the hell does the motherfucker want to go?
Paco: To the heart of the question, honey.
Don Lorenzo: I think Inspector Montoya can take his own decisions.
UA: Like blowing his brains up in the roof of this precinct after you killed, no, sorry, “shot”, your ex-lover??
Paco: Gonzalo, you don’t really have to listen to this.
Montoya: Don’t worry, Paco, I thought it was gonna be like this.

UA: Captain Castro, according to my reports, you lost a grandson because of a gunshot wound. [Translator's comment: Okay he’s not creepy, he’s a sick bastard!!!]
Paco: Motherfucker! [Translator's snark: Just what I was thinking, thanks Paco]
Lola: What the hell…?
Don Lorenzo: Yes… Silvia, Silvia
Lola: Sister, sister, come here.

Don Lorenzo: Yes.

Judge: Mister Portillo, could you please read out loud the statement signed by Captain Castro from the 30th June 2007.
Portillo: Of course. [Reads statement] No, I don’t remember if I saw the gun or not, I just remember that when I hung up, I shot Miss Montalbán in cold blood. I could have just disarmed her, I could have shot her in the arm, in the leg, or somewhere else… But I emptied the magazine in her stomach.
Judge: Can you check if the statement by Captain Castro has not been manipulated since it was taken?
Portillo: Of course, the statement is correct.

UA: Did you lie in that statement, Captain Castro?
Don Lorenzo: Yes.
UA: Are you sure?
Don Lorenzo: Yes.
UA: Well, I am not sure! You know what I think? I think you’re lying now!

Lola: [walks into the IR infuriated] You are no attorney, you’re a simple nazi!
Portillo: Please.
Don Lorenzo: Lola, please.
Lola: After the hostage taking, my father spent four days wandering like a lost soul, taking all the shit on himself.
Paco: Lola, honey, let’s go.
Judge: Please, get out of here, Mrs Castro. There’s a death to clarify and several contradictory statements. We’re only trying to get to the truth, and that’s very difficult when the defendant changes his opinion every day.
Lola: My father is no executioner!
Paco: Let’s go, honey.
Lola: Paco…

Portillo: Well, that was Mr Puchal, from the Central station. The rest of the witnesses have finished their statements and they have all coincided in the first degree homicide thesis.
Paco: What witnesses? It was only Uriarte and his men down in the cells.
Portillo: The witness is Uriarte.

Judge: Fine. We’re going to carry out that interrogation, and, if I consider it necessary, I will ask for a confrontation. Now we are going to take a break.

Rita is still unconscious at the lab, being watched over by the world's worst baby sitters, Quique and Curtis. Aitor is singing his goat song to Sabinica. Back at the Kaiser rig, Allison "hacks" into the police server to check out Lucas - she finds Lucas' fake rap sheet and is very impressed. Paco's house: Sara has another Lucas dream where they keep shouting "te quiero" to one another. At the station, Rita is still out of it, but Sabinica is hungry and needs to be fed.  So the Pacos have the the bright idea to bring her to her mother's boobs and let her feed herself (Piper's snark: And what, drug Sabinica as well? Valium-flavored mother's milk?).  But it doesn't work, so they find a gypsy lactating inmate to provide the milk supply. Uriarte is brought in to give his statement and Lola goes ballistic, exchanges words with the chipmunk, then bitchslaps him. At the interrogation room, Uriarte lies through his chipmunk teeth. 

Paco: Silvia, control your sister, she’s capable of anything.
Judge: According to you, what were the circumstances of Miss Montalbán’s death?
Uriarte: Captain…
Portillo: If you excuse me, Your Honor, I need to leave the interrogation.
Judge: Please, go ahead.
Uriarte: Captain Castro was aiming at her with his gun…
Lola: Come on, Paco, my dad couldn’t even breathe! How was he supposed to put a gun in her hand?

UA: The Ministerio Fiscal rejected that statement [Montoya’s] after the drug test results.
[Silvia Runs after Montoya]
Silvia: Gonzalo, Gonzalo, Gonzalo… Are you OK?
Montoya: Why wouldn’t I?

At the labyrinth, the fugitives reach the end but they still need to get past the iron gate. While Lucas is trying to cut the bars open, Salazar has a better idea - they blow up the gate. After the dust has settled, we see Lucas with an iron bar lodged right below his collar bone and he is bleeding. Pove cradles him as they start singing Se Me Vido Otravez... Probablemente ya de mi te has olvidado, y sin embargo yo te seguiré esperando... No, not really, but Lucas just used one of his nine lives on this one. Back at the precinct, the police scanner is still on:

Paco: How’s it going?
Policeman: The GEO [SWAT] units are in.

[On the radio]

Policeman 1: Central Station, the corpses have been identified. I repeat. The corpses have been identified. They are Alonso Millán, 35, and José Javier Estévez De La Fuente, 32, both common inmates from Module B...
Paco: I knew it, I knew it couldn’t be them.

Other stories: Pove turns into Incredible Hulk and starts beating up Salazar's homie. Lucas lies unconscious while Sara dreams of saving him from drowning.  Actually, this is the first dream where she and Lucas weren't doing the chiki-chiki.  Just as she wakes up from her dream, Lucas also wakes up with an iron rod embedded in his chest. *Barf* Mariano's mysterious cop friend from last episode is back. He's actually imaginary, kinda like the Paul Bettany character in "A Beautiful Mind" - very awesome movie, by the way.

Watch clip in HD

Piper's Comments:
We've seen kickass Silvia and hot Silvia from the last 2 episodes.  But this episode brings us miserable Silvia. I don't think she smiled more than once, and I don't blame her.  Major praises for Rita.  The Sara / Lucas storyline was overdone, as usual, but you are spared from barfing throught it because their scenes are not in the clip.  And whoever thought the 3-episode sweater that Silvia is wearing is worth 3 episodes: Why didn't you go for red?  Red is a good color on Silvia.

Marian Aguilera, Los Hombres de Paco, LHDP

Looking to Kill Some Time...

I remember the exact day I first caught a glimpse of PepSi magic on youtube. It was July 11th, 2008. But, let me back up and give a little preface to my “First-Time” story.

AfterEllen made a mention of PepSi in their “Best. Lesbian. Week. Ever.” on May 23th. I remember reading the fairly confusing description of the show…and not really thinking much of it. I have to admit that the pictures of MA and LS chosen for inclusion in the article didn’t really make me look twice.

Any interest I might have had in searching out this show, though, was overshadowed by the fact that I was moving into a new apartment the weekend of July 4th. It was going to be a huge move involving three people moving from two apartments into two new apartments…not so much fun. But anyway, I was pretty consumed with getting everything ready for the Big Move and didn’t have much free time to look up tv shows with possible lesbian storylines.

July 11th, the Friday after the move, I stayed home to do some more unpacking. Before calling it a night, I decided to chill out in front of the computer for a bit and I ended up checking out AfterEllen. Well, lo and behold, a new “Best. Lesbian. Week. Ever.” had been posted that day. I have to say the pictures definitely got my attention that time.

Since I was finished unpacking for that night and had nothing else to do, I thought it wouldn’t hurt to go to youtube to see what I could find and maybe kill a little time. (A little time? Hah! Try a year and four months so far of time.) The rest of the weekend was spent in a PepSi haze. I don’t even think I did anymore unpacking that weekend. I just sat in front of the computer searching out all the PepSi-related videos and websites I could. I stayed up until 6 in the morning on both Friday and Saturday night, reading and watching (and re-watching) everything I could find. And that was it. I was hooked.

I never thought I’d be an active participant in a fandom, but PepSi got me discussing episodes with others for the first time, commenting on fanfics for the first time, reading (non-classroom) Spanish for the first time, editing other peoples’ stories for the first time, and writing my own fiction for the first time. My “First-Time” with PepSi led to many other amazing firsts…and for that reason, LHDP will never be “just a tv show” to me. I’m grateful to have been able to witness such an amazing story unfold and I’m grateful to share my passion with such a fantastic group of people. Thank you all for being a part of making the “PepSi Phenomenon” so enriching and fulfilling…and fun!

Piper's Note:

I can't remember when we invited Cela to join the Faculty - I think we were all drunk when we did.  Just kidding.  While her initial appointment was to be the Adjunct Bartending Professor and Manager of the 24/7 Bar, Cela's talents lie in organizing parties.  Imaginary parties.  She is also in charge of keeping me distracted when I so want to be snarky; in other words, she is Piper's bouncer.  And I'm hoping she will spend more time in the classroom posting lectures instead of lecturing at the bar, because no one can come up with one-liners better than Cela.  And when you put all her one-liners together into a lecture, it might not make a lot of sense but it will be fucking hilarious.  So thank you C-E-L-A for believing in Pepsi University and for never ever letting the campus go dry. 

"Like Being in Love Can Feel For the First Time"

During law school I took a "Women and the law" course. The purpose was to look at how the law affects women and how different manifestations connect to create systems of oppression - gender, race, sexual orientation, disability, etc. In taking that course I saw, for the first time, things that always existed in the world but were largely invisible to me because language and the law has been used to create social norms and false dichotomies.

In trying to make the invisible more visible, I somehow stumbled across AE, where I really began to notice how underrepresented the gay community is on TV and film. While reading the July 11, 2008 post of "Best. Lesbian. Week. Ever." I saw the article on PepSi describing Ep. 76 (countryside getaway) and immediately noticed from the tone of the article that this story seemed different than all of the other lesbian stories on TV - neither character was a killer, or ratings stunt, or ended up dead (yet). But what really piqued my interest were these lines from the article: "Unfortunately, the scene ended when Silvia's dad intentionally walked in on the two women, after spying on them having sex. Apparently, this is a habit of his. Creepy much?"

I thought, "That can't be right. That sounds too absurd - it much be a translation error" so I decided to check out the forum Breakerfall started on AE and found myself even more confused, yet intrigued, trying to figure out the family dynamics and determine what the hell was really going on. After searching on YouTube, I came across ThoseRaindrops' "Pepa and Silvia - The Build Up" video. To this day, it is one of my favorite PepSi videos ever. Everything about it was perfect - the music selection, the edited scenes, the acting. Watching it reminded me of the opening scene in Mr. and Mrs. Smith, where Brad and Angelina are dancing at the restaurant in Bogota and later sitting in the rain and gazing at each other while drinking tequila. There's barely any dialogue - just "Mondo Bondo" playing in the background - but the glances they give each other and the sexuality oozing from that scene makes you want to see more. This is how I felt watching ThoseRaindrops' video. The looks, the glances, the hesitation, the fear, the lust, the chemistry - it was so compelling that I wanted to see more, learn more about their story. When I finally saw the bathroom scene as it aired, with basically no dialogue and just Dana Kerstein's "My Soul Ghost" playing in the background, I was hooked. And for the first time I saw something that had been invisible on American TV - a story of two people who were falling in love and who both just happened to be women.

Over time, my love grew beyond PepSi to the entire show. But it was that bathroom scene - with just Pepa, Silvia, and Dana's voice - that opened my eyes to the invisible. That scene (and many of their subsequent scenes) showed me what being in love can feel like and the journey it can take you on, regardless of your race, gender, or sexual orientation. It's a feeling that, I imagine, is akin to what being in love can feel like the first time.

kalike

*The title for this lecture is based on lyrics to the song "First Time" by Lifehouse.

Piper's Note:
KC's debut post at AE was after Ep 104 when she wrote about how it just set women's TV roles a few centuries back. OK, maybe not a few centuries, but still.  Her subsequent postings show a cerebral adulation for Pepa, and knowing the Silvia-centric lectures we've had so far, we decided we needed a Pepalogist.  And KC has not disappointed, in her treatises and her choice of songs, and personally, I think she is more on the romantic side of the Pepsi Empire (i.e., please go back to her initial lectures about the "L" word) than she would want to accept.  Thank you, Counsel, for your unbridled analytical romanticism and intellectual love for Pepa.

My Awkwardest Post Ever

I'm not going to lie, when Dr. Booker asked me to write about my first time and share it, I thought, "Wait! Now everyone's gonna know about how stupid and awkward it was for me? But I guess then we could all swap stories and maybe I won't feel so bad a-" And then I kept reading her email and she meant first time experiencing PepSi and then I thought... "Ah...that makes more sense."

And after all that business was cleared up to my brain, I started thinking back to early January of this year... Now sit back and relax for about two whole seconds to read about my amazing discovery!

Like many others, I searched around (somewhat desperately *Snorts*) for some lesbian content on a show. In the US... it was/still is basically non-existent. I mean, we had Callica... but I wasn't too fond of the couple. I don't know what it was I didn't like, but I was never really interested. So the only resort I had, was to watch Youtube clips of other countries shows.

I watched Naomily, and I must admit they were good... but I dunno, maybe it was their age or something that made me not get into it as much as I'd like. Though they were wonderful. Then I tried to watch Hospital Central, but it was all sortsa clustered, and I didn't know how to navigate it, the story was all jumbled and I watched things out of order and I was just too f&#king confused to get into it. Yes, yes, I'm a bit... stupid. Like you haven't noticed.

Then, I read Breakerfall's post, and thought, "Why not?" I went over to Youtube, typed in Pepa and Silvia, and thank the goddesses that are Pepsienglish and Random_Flores... I watched the first compilation and completely understood what was going on. But understanding what they were saying alone was not what kept me watching... it was the badassness that was Pepa Miranda, her gun, and the cute little way that Spaniards have an almost lisp when they use their "C's". Yeah... so just imagine how much I nearly fainted when Pepa pulled her gun out on Paco in that warehouse!

But it wasn't until "The Awkwardest Stakeout Ever" scene where I absolutely fell completely head over heels in love with the pair, the both of them, together. I was positively convinced that they would make the perfect couple. Watching them steal glances at each other in that car. The blushing from our numero uno pelirroja, the heated stare from the heart stealing, self-proclaimed romantic fool. The fidgeting and lip biting to convey nervousness and sexual tension, Pepa playing it cool even though you knew she was just as nervous. The admission of who was the redhead's first kiss, the brunette taking full advantage of that information to subtly (none too subtly) flirt with Silvia. It was all just... right.

For me that scene will never be topped. And I don't just mean in PepSi land.

Piper's Note:
Professor JuneBuggy was famous in PepSi Fanfic literary circles long before she joined the university.  Booker was a fan and she thought that JB's writings are far too precious not to be a part of Pepsi U. I personally do not read fanfics, especially the graphic ones because I have the sex-knowledge IQ of a 7-year old.  So I had no idea who JB was until she joined the Faculty as the head the newly-created Smut Department.  I have read her PepsiU fics since and I have to admit I am still flummoxed and a tad embarassed sometimes... but I'm weird that way.  So thank you, JB, for being a part of PepSi University, for your PG-13 lectures, and most of all, for caring for what we are doing.

4th of July 2008 Weekend

I remember exactly when I became a PepSiholic - it was the 4th of July 2008 weekend.  Which was about 6 weeks after I became aware of Pepa, Silvia, and Los Hombres de Paco.  Yes, I was a slow convert.

I did not read AE - my GF did. That's how she discovered Hospital Central and Maca, and that's how she learned of PepSi.  She was into PepSi LONG before I was, and during every other weekend when we saw each other, she made me watch Pepsi clips: the bathroom scene, the morning after breakfast, lab aventurilla exotica... Couldn't care less but I still translated for her, badly, I might add.  The hangar scene - nope, nothing, although the line about the nuns made me giggle.  And then... and then... there it was - the exact moment when I actually fell in love with the show: Silvia giving Pepa the finger.

When Silvia flipped Pepa the finger, she also flipped her way right into my heart and Sube a mi Cohete  made it into my iPod.  And I realized how gorgeous this redhead is.

And by the middle of summer, I have downloaded and watched all the past LHDP episodes. Along the way, I have loved and lost an Asturian, made new friends and lost some...story of my life. And long after my GF has moved on to new obsessions (Shakira and Top Chef), here I am still a Silvialogist.

I cannot really say why I love these 2 characters - I don't have the gift of romantic gab like my friend Booker - but it has been a delight watching them week after week.  It has been a privilege watching old LHDP episodes and bringing them to you, so you too can understand why I am a Silvialogist. 

It's the finger.  It's Silvia, flipping the finger.  After 16 months, that scene still makes me smile. Silvia and her middle finger still make me smile.

Looking for a few good lesbians...

Members of our faculty are sharing their stories about their first time--their first time with PepSi. How did they discover these women and LHDP? Tell us about your first time, we asked.
Here is my story.

I am known as a romantic and I deserve that label. I am in love and I love the idea of being in love. All I have ever wanted was to see two women in love on television or in film--was that too much to ask for? Apparently it was.

I heard about Central Hospital's Maca and Esther via AE and I was hooked. I loved the characters and, may I say, Patricia Vico. On their site, it was announced that LHDP was going to introduce a new lesbian character. The first thing I thought was "what was it about Spain and lesbians?!"

I watched Pepa's arrival and the gentle flirtation between the two women--all in Spanish. This was before Pepsienglish opened up my world. So the only way I could have any idea about what was going on was to read the updates on the forum and watch the scenes over and over. And over. It didn't matter, I had found the lesbian story that I had always dreamed existed.

I asked myself why I like them right from the start. There are numerous reasons why I love PepSi today, but what drew them to me in those early episodes? This was what I thought in early 2008: (I don't deny that some of these comments are shallow)

• Marian and Laura were so beautiful, they were like YouTube eye candy
• Their story line was respectful to their friendship and their growing romance
• These two actors had great chemistry and there was this building suspense about how and when they would kiss--get thee to a bathroom!
• They were simply sexy together

All of us can remember the stripper joint scene. When Pepa taught Silvia to dance in the interview room...how Pepa first touched Silvia and then left the room....Silvia leaned back on the table...she was completely flustered and rattled by Pepa. Well, that was me each week watching PepSi. My heart would flutter, my jaw would drop, my eyes would widen and I smiled like I had just won the lesbian lottery.

This romantic fool was happy. Blissfully happy.

Dr. Booker

Piper'sNote:
Dr. Booker was the very first one after myself who posted a lecture at Pepsi University.  I invited her because of our shared love for Teddy Kennedy.  Her lectures have added so much and taught us so much that I cannot imagine a Pepsi University without Booker. But she does so much more than post lectures: she invites lecturers and schedules their posts, she comes up with weekly themes like this Lecture Series, and most importantly, she cares for Pepsi University (sometimes I think she cares more than I do).  So thank you Booker, for everything.

Silvialogy 4x05

LHDP 4x05

By Dr. Pied Piper
(with translations and smart ass comments by Dr. Bekelauer)

(If you want to watch the episode without downloading it, the link is at the end of the post)

The episode begins with Mariano getting ready to get his brain flushed. Dr. Lobotomy asks him if he's sure and they they proceed to vacuum out his bad memories. This freaky green light scans his face while he flashbacks to his memories with Lola in descending order, and then it's done.

At the penitentiary, it is total chaos while the fire alarm is blaring.  Lucas calls Sara.  While the fire alarm in blaring very loudly.  Because you know, if you're life is in danger and you need someone to talk to, you call your 18-year old ex-GF whom you stranded in Madagascar.  GAH!  And of course, she doesn't pick up. DL calmly gets dressed. After 3 tries, Sara reluctantly picks up the phone. Lucas thought that it was the best time to tell her why she ended up in Africa alone and that he knows she loves him as much as he loves her and he will wait for her forever.  *Barf!* Sara cries and hangs up the phone.  [Piper's snarky comment: Yeah, yeah, I've heard the "forever line" before and I'm ready to decree that people should never ever be allowed to use the word "forever" in any context unless they absolutely know what they are talking about.] Lucas hangs his head on the window all emo, while the sirens are blaring.

Paco's House: Mariano is convalescing at Paco's house, while Paco watches over him.  WTF?  I guess there is no such thing as a clean break in San Antonio.  Prison: Pove is being calmly led out of jail by Salazar and his homies.  And since this is LHDP, DL and Lucas have an emo talk right then and there about Sara before DL too is sprung from jail by the suits.  Paco's House: Paco is still watching Mariano and decides to call his long lost sister PEPA then hangs up on her.  Which I totally missed when I was editing the clip / episode, so my bad. But we've all seen that clip a million times before, right?

Pepa: Si? Who's this? Eh, sorry, but I can't hear you. Who are you? Si? Hola?

Paco hangs up and breathes into his paper bag again while Mariano sleeps on the bed.  Paco and Lola's matrimonial bed!  How cruel is that?  Lola comes in and asks what's going on. Prison: As they have learned during their fire drills, the inmates all go out to the yard. Pove waves his red "I'm in danger" handkerchief to Lucas who is looking out from the infirmary.  Paco's House: Mariano wakes up and the last thing he remembers is Portillo talking about Ruth.  Which doesn't make sense because Portillo did not appear until after Ruth was killed, and Mariano and Lola by then had already shared lots of kisses at the cemetery.  But whatever.  Mariano says he has a headache (you think?) and is hungry.  Seriously, how dumb is this show, or worse, how dumb do they think their viewers are?  Is there such a thing as selective memory clean up?  Do our brains organize and file our memories into little drawers with labels?  Lola tells Paco not to tell Mariano what procedure he just underwent.

Prison: All the inmates are in the courtyard with only about 2 guards to watch over them.  Double GAH! And of course, the brilliant suits thought it is the best time to lead DL out - during a fire alarm and while most of the inmates are in out in the open (outmates?)!  Have I already said how dumb this show truly is? One of Salazar's homies throws something at DL's head, which causes it to bleed.  And then all the inmates start throwing stuff at DL & suits and they have to run to the waiting armored car transport.  TOTAL CHAOS and perfect cover for Salazar, et.al. to walk out unnoticed.  Lucas is now outside and ready to take Pove away when a fight breaks out which of course preoccupies Mr. Macho Iberico. A dirty prison guard leads Salazar, et. al. to escape and opens the gate for them just as Lucas catches up, quick staring match, then they all run away from the courtyard. (Again, doesn't make sense.  Homie just stabbed his buddy in cold blood with no provocation, and here's Lucas with a cast on his arm and about to crimp their escape, and he doesn't even try to pinch him?)

At the lab, Silvia is taking Montoya's blood for testing.

Silvia: If you don’t relax, I’m not going to find your vein.
Montoya: Let’s see, what’s this whole random drug test about?
Silvia: The district attorney who’s handling my father’s case has ordered it because Portillo asked him to.
Montoya: Portillo? Fuck!
Silvia: Come on, relax.
Montoya: That’s all I needed!

[Silvia draws Montoya’s blood]

Silvia: Did I hurt you?
Montoya: The first or the second time you broke up with me?
Silvia: The prick, I meant.
Montoya: I will get over it… over the prick. [Translator's sarcasm: No, Gongon, you are the prick here! Piper's sarcasm to Translator's sarcasm: What the #$%^ is "Gongon"?]
Silvia: Hold that tight so you don’t get a bruise.
Montoya: Ehhmmm… How are you?
Silvia: How do you think I am…? Fine. Why?

Montoya: After what happened with your… With our… baby… Lots of things have happened after that and we haven’t talked about anything.
Silvia: [watery eyes] I feel fine [Translator's reaction: Somehow I don’t buy it!]. Now all you have to worry about is yourself, all right? And if you need to talk or anything else, you just tell me.
Montoya: Well, if it’s “something else”… maybe yes [Translator's note: He means sex].
Silvia: Gonzalo, I’m being serious. I don’t think you’re fine and making stupid jokes won’t fix anything [Translator's swoon: Super hot authoritarian line, lovely!]

Gonzalo: Well, I AM fine. I am fabulous [Translator's comment: I know fabulous doesn’t do justice to "de puta madre", but since he used it before in 4x04 I decided to make it his recurrent phrase, it’s called Translator’s decision-making power]
Silvia: You sure? Then why are your hands shaking?

While Lucas, Pove, Salazar, Salazar's homie, and dirty prison cop are running away from the prison house, Sara is moping at home.  Lola comes in to talk to her, and since she did not close the door, it's an open invitation for Paco to come in as well but Sara is still really angry about the whole Madagascar thing.  Haha!  I have visions of Sara talking to Melman and Alex. Paco gets a call to meet DL at the comisaria, Mariano is eating a jamon serrano bocadillo, and Lola sees an application to join the Cuerpo Nacional de Policia on Sara's bed.

At the comisaria, Montoya is lying naked in the shower, kinda fetal position, half crying, lost… Silvia draws the shower curtain and finds him lying there.

Silvia: Gonzalo! [shocked] Are you all right?
Montoya: Ehmmmm… Sss… Yes, I am fine [Translator's sarcasm: sure you are…] I had just finished. Ehmmm… Your dad, is he all right? Is he coming here?
Silvia: Yes, he is on his way. They’re going to make him give his deposition again in a couple of hours.

Montoya: Well, it looks like everything’s better now.
Silvia: Well, yes, everything’s going back to place [Translator's pervy comment: He’s looking at her with a mixture of sadness and desire, I can’t tell]. I’m gonna take my shower, okay?
Montoya: Yeah, go ahead.
Silvia: … It’s just that I’ve performed four autopsies today and my body smells like the Anatómico Forense [Translator's note: It’s a Spanish forensics institution where the important or relevant autopsies are performed, so not the nicest of scents!] Are you okay?
Montoya: Yes, yes, I’m fine.

Still in the changing room. Silvia is taking a shower. Montoya… has a dirty mind! He draws the shower curtain, Silvia picks up her towel INSANELY SLOWLY – excuse me - and the Translator starts hyperventilating.

Montoya: Hello… No… Are you not gonna ask me what was I doing lying there?
Silvia: Gonzalo, I would love if you told me anything you have to tell me without me asking you. [Silvia removes some foam from Montoya’s hair] Come in [Translator's and Piper's reaction: WTF?], you have shampoo all over your hair.

[Translator's observation: Montoya goes in, Silvia rinses his hair – is it just me or this is a very weird sweet asexual scene?]

Montoya: Silvia, those tests you were running before… are…
Silvia: The attorney wants to know if you’re clean.
Montoya: What if I’m not?
Silvia: Disciplinary action would be taken against you, and your statement in my father’s case would be rejected.

[They hug – very moving]

(How hot is Silvia, really?)

House: Lola is complaining about her daughter wanting to become a cop: she's already the daughter, wife, and sister of one.  The last thing she wants is to be the mother of one as well.  Sara hears all this, because apparently in Spain, it is socially acceptable to listen in to private conversations.  After Sara goes out, Paco has the brilliant idea to get her to talk to his shrink.  Mariano is ready to go back to his apartment about 5 steps away, thanks his hosts, and tells Lola, in a totally casual way, that she's looking beautiful.

(Sorry, I couldn't stop making Silvia screen caps.  How about her waterproof mascara, huh?)

Prison: Pove, Lucas, Salazar, et. al., are waiting out the riot inside the jail office. Apartment: Sara is outside when Aitor walks in to deliver an envelope for Paco.  She again tries to rope Aitor back, telling him that they had something before the whole Madagascar thing, but Aitor is adamant that it is over. Sara cries because she's now single and the convent seems like a good place to mend her broken heart and broken ego.

Paco and a junk-food laden Mariano walk into the precinct, met by a freshly showered Silvia who will be wearing the same clothes in the next 3 episodes. 

Paco: Silvia, did they bring your father already?
Silvia: We’re still waiting. What happened to you, Mariano?
Mariano: Nothing, just got a tiny cyst removed.
Silvia: But are you okay?
Mariano: Yeah, I’m fine.
Silvia: Well, I’ll see you in a bit then.
Paco: Yeah, sure.

Jail: Pove, Salazar, and Homie are now dressed as riot cops, but Lucas has no costume (so no trick or treating for you!).  At the comisaria, Dr. Shrink is waiting for Paco at his office, really pissed, because he was interrupted at the Opera.  He dumps Paco and is about to walk out when Paco tells him it is not for him but for his daughter who wants to be a cop.  Why does everything revolve around Sara?

DL, in handcuffs, walks into the precinct.

Silvia: [coming downstairs] Papa… How are you?
Don Lorenzo: Very well.
Silvia: What’s that in the back of your neck?
Don Lorenzo: Nothing… I banged my head against the van door while getting in… I’m fine, honey.
Silvia: You have bags under your eyes. Are they controlling your sugar levels?
Don Lorenzo: Yes.
Silvia: Okay. You got your FG tests?
Don Lorenzo: Yes, I got everything tested, FG, the Ph, everything. I am doing well, honey, very well.

Paco: Don Lorenzo…
Don Lorenzo: Yes…
Paco: Povedilla…
Don Lorenzo: [to Rita] How is Sabinica doing?
Rita: She’s very healthy.
Paco: So yeah... Have you seen Povedilla?
Don Lorenzo: No, I haven’t seen him.
Paco: And Lucas?
Silvia: They have just informed me that Lucas has been discharged and he’s not in the infirmary anymore. He’s with the rest of the inmates. And apparently there’s some sort of a riot in the backyard.

Don Lorenzo: They got a little nervous when they saw me leave. People in there get very sentimental with farewells [Translator's reaction: He cracks me up]
Portillo: Captain, your lawyer is waiting for you in the interrogation room. And both the attorney and the judge are coming at 2130 to take your statement. If you don’t mind coming with me, please.
Paco: Portillo, do think this is necessary? [pointing at Don Lorenzo’s handcuffs]
Portillo: I would like to take them off myself, but until the judge passes a different judgment, Captain Castro is still under protected custody. Those are the rules…
Paco: Do you want me to tell you where I shove your rules? [Translator's snide remark: Is it a Captain thing to shove things up their santos cojones?] Do you want me to tell you?
Don Lorenzo: Paco, Paco, Paco… It’s all right. The Inspector is just fulfilling his obligations. Okay?

Paco: Okay.
Don Lorenzo: C’mon, let’s go.
Silvia: Papa… [Translator's note: She stops him, looks at him in the eye very tendery, lifts his arms and hugs him thru the handcuffs. Cheesy music in the back… Everybody joins the hug – I would say “this looks like a big Teletubbie gathering” if it wasn’t because I think it’s very moving.]
Don Lorenzo: [touched] You don’t know how thankful I am. You don’t know how much I’ve been longing to be back here with you all.

Rest of the episode: Pove, et.al., are still trying to escape. Paco invites Dr. Shrink to his house for dinner and to talk to Sara. Paco applies reverse physochology and wishes Sara goodluck on her entrance exam, to Lola's chagrin. His phone rings about the riot at the prison ground and that some people have died. They rush back to the comisaria to monitor the situation.

Prison: Pove and company manage to get out of one section of jail by pretending Lucas is a crazy felon and the rest of them are cops. Precinct: Mariano goes to the breakroom and sees a cop we've never met before but it seems they know each other because they hug and chat and reminisce about their days at the academy; later, Strange Guy just ups and leaves. House: Lola and Sara are by the sink next to a rather good-looking leg of ham, and we learn that Lola thought about becoming a cop when she was 20 years old.

 

Jail: Pove and company get to another prison wing and they go to a large rest room where Dirty Prison Cop has hidden guns etc. for Salazar and Homie and a reveals a secret door hidden by a toilet bowl.  Precinct: Mariano is called in to give his statement but since he has undergone a lobotomy, he doesn't remember a thing.  At Shawshank Redemption, homie shoots Dirty Cop and was about to kill Lucas but he was over-powered and Lucas pretends to hold Pove hostage.  Precinct: Mariano totally screws up and renders DL's past statement null and void.  Afterwards, Mariano is left in the Interrogation Room pondering what he couldn't remember when Paco and Strange Cop come in.  After Paco walks out, Strange Cop yells at Mariano and tells him what he has tried to forget - that he's in love with Lola.  He yells back and accuses his friend of lying, but the electrode marks on his head prove otherwise.

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Piper's Note: If last episode was kick-ass Silvia, this one shows really HOT Silvia.  Shower scene.  Need I say more?  Of course Montoya ruined an otherwise perfect scene, but we can imagine Pepa in his place, and the shower being the one at Paco's house... you know where I'm going with this. 

But it always breaks my heart when I see DL and Silvia - how Silvia mothers him, a role she probably assumed after her mother died, how he adores her daughter in return - and then I think about Ep 104 and I cannot imagine the pain DL must have been through, if he were a real feeling person.  So I just pretend that 104 never happened and Pepa and Silvia are somewhere in Centre City, Philadelphia attending The Vidocq Society's monthly symposium, and I will be meeting them for dinner later.  Yeah, that's it.

Marian Aguilera, Laura Sanchez, Pepa, Silvia, Los Hombres de Paco, LHDP