9x13 El Acabose de los Tiempos - Complete Recap

9x13 El Acabose de los Tiempos (The Last Straw of Time)

By Drs. Bekelauer & Piper

So here we are, the very last original LHDP episode, the end of the line. For what it's worth, this last episode was not lacking in effort from ATPP, so please sit back and enjoy this last goodbye from the folks of San Antonio.

Summary Recap

Pove pulls a joke on Curtis letting him think he slept with a prostitute on his wedding day, but it's actually not true. Curtis tells Rita anyway, right when they're about to get married.  So Rita runs away, arguing that the case is more important - it's the day Junior plans to kill Paco.  Deker tries to get Pepa to his island again, he even bought tickets to Lesbos in Greece to make her journey to the other side of the sexual spectrum (into Heteroville) less traumatic. How considerate! Pepa gently lets him down, and that's the end of Peker.

Mariano drugs Paco and locks him in one of the holding cells to prevent him from meeting Junior and getting killed. Then the boys go on a mission to the last spot of the pentagram, a monastery where a secret society of the Roman Catholic Curia is going to meet. Deker finds out that Junior might have drugged Sara to induce labor even though she's only 8 months along. Sara of course gives birth - it's a boy and he looks too big for a preemie. Junior kidnaps the baby to force Paco to show up for their date. I think he is utterly infatuated with The Bearded One. Pepa lets Paco out of the holding cell and they all go on a field trip. Somewhere along, Aitor confesses to Lis that he loves her. And Deker and Reyes plan to get away (since they both have just been dumped).

At the monastery, Senior tells Junior that the society is going to hand him to the authorities as a proof that Faith beats evil, and that he is no heir of the shadows or anything, and he's nothing but a Satan wannabe. Which makes the Satanic plot a big fat lie. Which makes this season simply lame. Junior feels betrayed by his own father, so he kills him. He then gets angry because Paco is late for their date so he is going to stab Sara's baby in sacrifice.  Paco and the whole precinct arrive just in time to stop him.  Junior stabs Paco with a giant ham-cutting knife and in return, the whole cast turns him into a human practice target. Junior is wounded and bloodied with around 8 shots hitting him everywhere, but does he die right away?  NO!  He hovers around. What happened to the "best shot in San Antonio"? Just when you start to wonder whether Junior is really immortal, he drops dead. LHDP drama ensues, implying that Paco dies, but he doesn’t. 

One year later, DL is giving his retirement speech and Paco is appointed new Commissioner. Aitor married Lis, Reyes is with Deker, Pepa is with not-Silvia who looks hot (so good job, Pepa!), Paco has married Salgado, and Rita is pregnant and her baby-daddy Curtis got a haircut. And the end is just a funny gag of a rowing team, which is Paco's battlecry.

Complete Recap

Paco voice over: All things come to an end, even if it hurts. Even if we’re not ready, we know that everything goes, sooner or later. But if I look back, I can only say that my life has been worth it. Ever since I arrived at this precinct with nothing to lose and my father-in-law offered me a second chance, my life has changed. With my friends. Like a fucking rowing team. A group that has not been broken by crime, by family secrets or by my stupid protective stubbornness, not even by the Napolitan mafia. With all these people that became friends one day, and family the next. Even if they’re not the council list, it doesn’t matter, even if I have to write their names down with a pencil at the margin. It’s the way life is. We all have to die. And just because that motherfucker has me in his hitlist, I am not going to let it affect my life. Not on the day my friends are getting married. I will carry on with my day, and then I’ll go looking for him.

Mariano, DL, and Paco are at the precinct, arguing.

Mariano: What the hell are you saying, Paco? It’s not the rest of your life – today is The Day! And there’s only one spot left in the hexagram – the monastery of St Andrew’s.

DL: Paco, according to the priest’s notebook, today is when he’s going to kill the last virtue, Hope. And the last virtue is the last person who donated blood in the accident of Guadarrama. Paco, you are that person.

Paco: I will do what I have to do.

Mariano: Paco, what you have to do is go in hiding. Pray to the Lord and to the National Police Forces, that’s what you have to do! You have lost your mind!

Sara (from the bing bong thingy outside the interrogation room): Inspector Moreno, please stop harassing him or I will report you. (Piper: Translator means Public Address system)

Sara walks in pregnant. She is already dressed for the wedding. Hugs and kisses for and from everyone.

Paco: Maybe I’ll die today, but I am going to live every second. And even if something ends today, I know it will be the beginning of something better.

Junior goes to meet Senior and is astonished that his Papi, who's been bedridden the last 8 years, can now walk and talk. Junior says he’s going to finish off the job – he is so convinced that he is Satan! “I will reign in the darkness forever”... Aye right!

LHDP Intro

Curtis wakes up at the newbies’ apartment all hangovered and next to what seems to be a hooker. Score! Rita knocks at Paco’s and Pepa goes and opens the door... in her underwear.

Rita: Looook!

Pepa: What the hell are you doing all dressed already? It’s still two hours til the wedding! (Translator: Pepa, you should get dressed too. Not that I mind you in your underwear, but it’s just weird that you’re there naked, that’s all. Well, maybe not. I don’t know. Nice lingerie btw...) You are Marilyn!

Rita: It’s just I’m so nervous and I thought “go get dressed!”. Oh, I’m so lame, maybe I’m going too fast? Because with all the sex and the express wedding... Poor Curtis, he’s not going have anything brand new tonight. Unless I buy him some pyjamas... For the first time in my life I am jumping into the void...

The hooker gets dressed and tells Curtis that he needs to pay her. Then he finds a pair of X-ray films showing something... weird.

Sara walks to Laureano Vicuña and has flashbacks of Lucas and Aitor – I thought we were done with that threesome crap! However, it’s not too annoying this time. Aitor walks down to see her – Lucas seems to be in Rihad on a mission. They have a tender, awkward moment, but they are cool.

At Lizarrán, Pove, Goyo, and Dani talk about the fact that Pove has played the joke of a lifetime on Curtis, just to get back at him for all the stuff he’s had to go through all these year. Flashback of vintage Pove moments. They made him believe that he had sex with a stripper and that he’s got a miniature train up his ass. That’s... nasty. But very LHDP. Curtis shows up and is really disturbed by what he thinks happened the night before. Povedilla gets a phone call from DL to go straight to the precinct so he doesn't get to tell Curtis the truth.

The briefing room has been decorated with wedding patters and white chairs and it seems that Curtis and Rita are going to get married AT THE PRECINCT. Yes, San Antonio is like a Las Vegas chapel, the wedding venue of choice. Reyes gets a phone call and leaves. DL tells Pove and Mariano that Senior, apparently standing on this own 2 feet, has left the nursing home / residence.

Curtis walks in with his best (wo)man Pepa (who's wearing some glittery number), everybody cheers. He looks like he is about to throw his own liver up.

Someone: Long life the groom!

Povedilla: If you excuse me, I need to talk to the groom.

DL: Sit down, fuck’s sake. Paco is in mortal danger, huge, terrible things are happening here. Go and talk to someone from the clinic, see what they tell you. When you find out, come in and give me a report.

Povedilla: How do you want me to report it? Should I text you? Or should I walk in with some rice so as not to be noticed?

DL: Yeah, bring two fucking rice paellas and we invite the priest as well. (Translator's note: He says "priest" but of course he means a lay person) You moron, you’re a fucking moron! 

Reyes is arguing with someone on the phone about keeping the patrols in the last corner of the hexagram, the monastery. Lis shows up and asks her what's going on – apparently, the hierarchy of the Church is not allowing the patrols in because they have summoned ranking clergymen to pray in this dark hour when Satan is coming to the world. Aye right! Reyes also tells her that Aitor has broken up with her, so Lis apologises for jeopardising their relationship. Then they agree not to get involved with any 29-year old (Translator: I thought Aitor was my age, like 24?). Lis will get the under 28’s, and Reyes the over 30’s.  Which, mathematically, also makes 28- and 30-year olds out of reach for either one of them.

Reyes sees Deker in the lab so she goes in to check. He is butt naked - HAHA! He explains that he needs a hand to CSI his body because he spent 4 hours with Satan and there’s probably something in him to help them solve the mystery and save Paco. I think he is actually the only one who has an idea of what’s going on in here.

Curtis looks more and more like he is about to throw up all his intestines.  Rita walks in to Lo Que No Ves. Paco takes her down the aisle.  For the 2nd time in the series.

Rita: When I woke up this morning, I wondered if we were not rushing too much. But now that I see you, I feel there’s nothing else to wait for. And if I had to pick someone to trust with my life, I would pick you. I’ve know how cute you are for a long time. And I love you.

The wedding starts and Povedilla walks in with a packet of rice. How convenient. He updates DL and makes a mess – vintage Pove. Curtis needs to be honest with Rita.

Reyes and Deker are having a tender moment. In a Deker fashion, of course – he is naked and she is CSIng him. She is depressed because of the Aitor fiasco and says, “Why do we even want to start things that are predestined to fail?”. Deker summarises his (and my) point of view about life: “The most important thing is not the destination, but the trip”. Then she finds something on his back, like little needle punctures.

At the wedding, Povedilla is still being noisy, so he leaves with DL and Mariano. They find Aitor in the hallway, who tells them that Senior has his room adorned with crucifixes and other religious items and that he was a priest. It seems that Senior belongs to a secret Church society, the Witnesses of the Resurrection. Lis approaches Aitor and starts yelling at him for dumping her mother.

Curtis confesses everything to Rita in the middle of the wedding ceremony.  Needless to say, she's not happy and gives a speech before she walks away, and rightly so.

Rita: Fellows, we are dealing with a police investigation that has already taken the lives of seven people. Today is a crucial day, and while we’re here, the investigation is still going on. And it’s going on because one of us is in danger, so I’m going to ask the judge if we could please go ahead with more important things, like the criminal investigation, and we can postpone the wedding. Excuse me.

DL is holding court at the ground floor of the precinct.

DL: Right, gentlemen, there is indeed a connection between the secret society of the Witnesses of the Resurrection and the series of murders that we’ve been dealing with. We have a tip that in a couple of hours, this society is going to organise a day of prayer in the next supposed scene of crime, the sixth corner of the star.

Mariano: While Don Lorenzo is trying to get a warrant to enter the venue, stop the mass, and place units inside, we’re going to organise a mission in the surrounding area.

Salgado: As far as I know, the CNI is also pulling some strings (Really?? Do they still want her after the whole Zebra clusterfuck?)

DL: Evidently yes, but the problem is the inviolability of the temple, we’re going to need at least...

Paco (interrupting): Do you know where I have the “inviolability”? (This is a question that begs a “Por mis santos cojones” reply). It’s over! No more bullshit! No CNI, no warrants, no more crap! We’ve stuck to protocol and we have nothing to show for it except seven corpses. Seven. (He goes to his office and takes out a spray bottle of chloroform... But of course it’s Paco’s best and most powerful weapon!) Let’s do what we have to do! What we know that works! Drugs and infiltration. The important thing is to be in, not out. All together. Gentlemen, who’s with me?

Pepa is the first one to step up for her brother, followed by Marina. This is vintage badge-handing moment. DL looks disgusted at first, but he is on board.

DL: Oh come on, we’re late already!

Mariano: Paco, you’re the last victim, the last virtue. And the victim and the location (in the hexagram) can’t come together. You’re not going anywhere from here.

Paco: I am going to go, and I’m going to be the first one there. He’s looking for me and he’s going to find me.

Mariano: All right, Paco, whatever you say. (And he sprays him with chloroform) A chair, quick, he’s falling, hurry!

Salgado provides the chair and looks like she’s about to piss herself laughing at Mariano’s idea.

Deker au naturale keeps flirting with Reyes. Pepa walks in and almost bursts out laughing at the scene before her.

Pepa: Inspector... The Captain is looking for you, he’s organised a mission.

Reyes: Very well, I’m off to the lab with the evidence. See you later.

Pepa: Later.

Deker (in a sort of asking her to leave tone): Ciao.

Pepa: Now you’re trying to play hard to get? May I remind you that it’s not the first time I've seen you in “all your splendour”.

Deker: Can you hand me my clothes?

Pepa: How’s it going?

Deker: All right.

Pepa: Any news?

Deker: No, no news. Hand me my clothes, please. (Pepa teases him) That thing over there is for you.

Pepa: A present? Or an invitation to re-offend?

Deker: Since you said that I should survive because maybe you might want to come to my island again... Here I am: young, alive, fertile... in my best moment.

Pepa: Deker, you were wrapped in Titadine yesterday, and I can’t be cool in those moments. And I might have overreacted, and maybe promised too much. Look, I told you once that what happened between us was marvelous, truly, but it’s not going to happen again.

Deker: Cool.

Pepa: You understand?

Deker: I understand. Since I was about to die, you told me pretty things, but now that I’m alive... everything’s cool. Everything’s cool.

Pepa (looks at the tickets): To Lesbos?

Deker: Yeah, to make the transition less traumatic.

Pepa: Pretty one.

Deker: I will have to resign myself to this shit of being friends. Anyway, what was done, was done, and can’t be taken from me.

He reaches to slap her in the butt, but she grabs him and twists his arm instead.

Pepa (sing-songy tone):  Easy with that hand! And you can look but you can’t touch.

Deker: Mamita... 

DL is at Confecciones Puri with Dani and Amaia. Mariano, Curtis, Pove and Goyo have set up a road block on the mainroad leading to the monastery. Pove argues with Curtis, who still thinks that he has fucked up. A car with 2 bishops (violet zucchetto), a cardinal (crimson), and a driver approaches.  Curtis stops it and argues with the passengers in best LHDP vintage. Pove sprays chloroform on the cardinal... who falls on the spikes, butt first.  Goyo takes care of the rest, i.e., he sprays them.

When you go to Catholic schools long enough, you get to identify these things...

Sara is lying on the sofa when Rita walks in. She tells her that she doesn’t want to get married because of what Curtis confessed. Sara defends Curtis and says that it is good to know how to forgive. She goes back to her history of “choosing”. Aitor goes to the newbies’ flat next door to talk to Lis but she doesn’t want to. Rita is heartbroken. Aitor and Lis still blame each other, and Aitor is about to confess his love when Sara screams and she sees that her water has broken.

DL is trying to justify the lack of smoothness of the mission to the newbies. Mariano orders Goyo to take the priest to hospital. Pove confesses to Curtis that the prostitute thing was all a joke and Curtis gets so worked up that he starts the car and accelerates, runs over the road block spikes, and blows their tires out.

Paco is drugged in one of the holding cells at the precinct, then wakes up. Salgado is there with him, and tells him that he can’t leave because he needs to keep on with his life. Oh, I see Pepa is there, so...

Salgado: Easy, easy Paco. Chloroform causes a terrible hangover.

Paco: Did the mission start?

Salgado: An hour ago. How are you? How are you, honey?

Paco: Marina, I know what you’re doing, but I don’t want to hide. I don’t want to dishonour my duties because of a threat. I don’t want fear to eat me alive. I don’t want to be locked away here for that motherfucker not to go on with his prophecy. Or to close his fucking circle, or kill me. Do you understand?

Salgado: Paco, listen to me, you’re not locked here because of that. You’re locked here because you have to have dinner with your daughter tonight, and you have to take your grandson to church to get him baptised in a couple of weeks. And you’re also here because you asked me to marry you last night and I told you I needed time to think about it. But now I realise that in life, sometimes, there’s no time. There’s no time. And that’s why you’re here. Because I want to say yes, I want to marry you, and live together for many years. Because if you walk out that door, we might not have time.

Pepa is standing nearby and hears everything, because, you know, it is socially acceptable in Spain to listen  to other people's conversations, and she is duly touched and now all is forgiven with Salgado. Whatever.

Back in Laureano Vicuña, Sara is in labor and being helped by Aitor and Rita. Just when she is about to pop her baby out, Sara decides that this is the proper moment to beg for forgiveness after all she did to Aitor. About time! She says that when she saw him and Lucas at Silvia and Pepa's wedding, she instantly knew that she had to be with Lucas.

Povedilla, Curtis, and Mariano, now wearing the bishops' vestments, are walking to the monastery. Pove asks Curtis to hit him.

Mariano: Let’s see gentlemen, in this precinct pretty much everyone has had an affair with somebody else’s woman. Paco with Marina, me with Lola, Lucas with everyone... not to mention the dead, because Gonzalo and Silvia were also free spirits, may they rest in peace.

Curtis says he’s not going to hit him because he is brokenhearted. He tries to flag a passing car so they can hitch a ride, but the car doesn't stop, and he starts swearing and chasing it.  Which is supposed to be funny because he is dressed as a bishop.

Reyes walks in the locker room and sees Deker smoking. They’re both brokenhearted. Reyes starts smoking with him. Deker suggests they could go somewhere together, and after some convincing she accepts. Someone walks in with the results from the lab. Oxytocin was present, a drug given to pregnant women to induce contractions – Deker and Reyes rightly deduce that Junior has gone after Sara.

Next thing we know, Sara is actually giving birth. Aitor and Sara have a tender moment. He says that he will never hate her because he loves her. Lis silently says, “WTF?”. He says that he also admires her for being able to choose so fast, and then he says that he also has had that “fraction of a second” in which he knew what he wanted... “in an elevator, with a girl dressed up as Santa”.  Afterwards, Sara gives birth to the chunkiest preemie baby ever. 

Paco is still in the holding cell. Pepa is watching him.

Paco: Pepa...
Pepa: Don’t even ask me, Paco.

Paco: What would you do if that motherfucker came for you? Would you like to be sitting in a cell while your friends do their best for you?

Pepa: I don’t know, Paco!

Paco: Well, I know! You would go out there with your gun, with your bare chest if necessary, and you would face anything that would come, because if you didn’t, when all would be over, you would never forgive yourself not doing anything, for staying put while your colleagues defend you, or worse, die for you.

Pepa: I can’t let you go, Paco, I can’t.

Paco: Yes, you can, and you’re going to. Because no one better than you knows that I have to do it, no one better than you.

Mariano, Curtis, and Pove have "borrowed" the bishops' vestments and are now walking to the monastery. Curtis puts his hand in his pocket and finds a train with a note from Pove, saying that he didn’t know what to give them for a present, so he bought them two tickets for the Orient Express and that he loves them and wants them to be happy ever after. Aawww! Curtis is moved and tells Pover that he loves him too and they forgive each other. At that same moment, a lorry drives by and they stop it.

Pepa and Paco are leaving the precinct when the SWAT patrol intervenes and stop them. Salgado shows up.

Salgado: I know the Mirandas. Paco, the gun, please.

Paco: At your orders, Commander.

Reyes: Inspector, do you know where your daughter is?

Paco: Why?

Deker: We think Satan might have established contact with her and induced her into premature labour. Call her now.

Goyo arrives at Confecciones Puri and says he has abandoned the priests at the door of the ER. Mariano, Pove, and Curtis are overhearing the conversation because their mics are still on. DL says he is going to teach the newbies how to be professionals because he does not want them to end up like “that band of pilgrims”. Never a truer word spoken. Then he scolds Goyo with his “santos cojones” repertoire.

Rita phones Curtis and tells him he forgives her. Sara misses a call from Paco. Aitor and Lis flirt tenderly in front of the baby. Then the paramedic arrives and takes the baby to the ambulance. Alone! Who the fuck lets a stranger take a newborn without its mother?! Aitor picks up the phone - it's Paco who asks him if he can see the baby. He goes down to the ambulance and see that the paramedic has been killed and the baby is nowhere to be found.

Mariano, Curtis, and Povedilla get to the monastery and they enter with the other priests. Then Deker explains in a voice-over the main points of ATPP's stupid Satanic plot, a blatant rip-off of Dan Brown's Angels and Demons.

Deker: The balance of universe is ruled in pairs, divided in opposite forces of the same magnitude. This way, Good remains balanced if Evil exists. But in these times, Evil is has devalued. Nobody fears it, nobody prays. The Witnesses of the Resurrection have known this for a long time long and they have been carrying out their plan. Damián Vallejo, one of the group's key members, conceived his own "devil" by a rape that cost him 8 years of penitence in a hospital bed. They raised the Chosen One making him believe that he was really Satan and that if he managed to "kill" all six theological virtues*, he would rule over the Earth. The twin was a mishap fixed by destiny, they used him like a puppet, like they used the three thousand followers of the order all over the globe, to make it look like a Satanic plot, all with the same purpose – to extend the fear of Satan, and bring people back to Church.

*Piper:  THREE!  There are only 3 theological virtues, 4 Cardinal virtues, and 7 Heavenly virtues.

Random Silvia picture from the flasbacks

The strabismus guy is the presiding priest of the secret meeting. Somebody is knocking at the door of the monastery and – ta-dah! Junior with Sara’s baby. Aitor phones DL to tell him that Satan has his great-grandson.

Senior: Hand me the baby, no more deaths. And time is not going to bring a new era.

Junior: Today is the great day, father. I need to spill the blood of the virtuous on the corner of the star, to open the doors of Solomon. 

Senior: No door is going to open, my son. You’re not going to rule over anything, and you are not the Chosen One. There won’t be an era of shadows, nor will Evil be eternal. Come with me. You have to come with us. Your example will be the proof to show the world that prayers beat Evil. We will say that the power of the Church beats Satan. We will hand you to the authorities, so faith will be renewed. Come with me, give me the baby, please.

Junior: Father, why did you abandon me?

And Junior, with an amazing karate chop, pushes Senior and kills him.  Back up shows up.

Mariano: Drop the baby, drop the baby.

Pepa: You here, you, over there!

That’s when we see for the first time the girl that will end up hooking up with! She nods silently and follows with her.

Mariano: Don Lorenzo, what shall we do?

Junior takes out a HUGE ham-cutting knife and is about to carve Sara's chunky baby. He looks like a ham anyway. (Piper scolding herself: Piper!  That's a very mean thing to say about a baby!) But Paco, our hero, shows up.

Paco: SATAN!!! I am here! Were you looking for me? I am the last virtue – Hope.

Mariano: No, Paco!

Paco: Here I am. Leave my grandson alone. My life for his.

Junior: Hope is in your blood. Do you want the boy to live?

Paco: Yes.

Junior: Then you will die.

Paco goes up to where Junior is, who drops the baby and then slices Paco with the ham knife. Angels and Demons soundtrack plays in the background. Well, you've already ripped the plot, why not rip the music as well? Paco falls down. 

Everyone starts shooting Junior, who takes an awfully long time to drop dead.  You know ATPP wants us to believe that maybe Junior really was immortal.  And now he wants us to ask that age-old question: Does Paco die?  We don't answer because we don't really care.

One year later... DL is giving his retirement speech to a glum audience.  ATPP still wants us to think that Paco died, so he can surprise us and we'd be happy.  Dumbass! You could have pulled that stunt at the beginning of this season!  Silvia would be alive, we'd be really happy, and you'd still have a show.

DL: Every agent who falls in the line of duty is like an open wound that never heals. I have been a Captain for 26 years and when I look back, all I can think of are the agents, our colleagues, who lost their lives under my command. And not even success, nor medals, can compensate or ease the pain. Today I am retiring, and I would like to ask you a favour. Please, let’s take a moment of silence to remember those who were once in this precinct.

They all stand and sort of cry. Very emotional.

DL: Thank you. One day, I heard one of my men say that the end of everything was just the starting point of something new. And if this is like that, today, the Castro era is over in this precinct, but only to let in one of our best... the best Captain.

Paco is taken in by Mariano and Salgado in a wheelchair. Pepa’s tears make me cry. Everybody cheers, DL gives him a medal. Reyes tilts her head towards Aitor and then towards Lis like sort of saying that Lis should be sitting next to him, so she goes and they hold hands and they are wearing wedding bands. Pepa looks at the (short) not-Silvia girl and gives her a cute little head nudge. Paco gives his speech.

Paco: Thank you. No... When spending nine months in a hospital bed, you can do lots of things. First, you can see that your preemie grandson already weighs 10 kilos. Guapo! Second, and thanks to you all, you can pass the tests to be a Captain. Thanks a lot.

At this point, Pepa and Deker look at each other – with his eyes, Deker asks her about the girl sitting next to her, and Pepa gives him the thousand watt smile. The girl mumbles “Guapa!” when Pepa looks at her. They both smile. I am genuinely happy for Pepa.

Paco: And lastly, the opportunity, maybe because the world is crazy – crazy enough to allow a man like me, who was supposed to be a locksmith, to be in charge of the best precinct in the world, San Antonio. Chance, or, thank God, borne of this man’s stubbornness, Don Lorenzo’s. Without him, I don’t know, I don’t know where I’d be.

Deker and Reyes hold hands – Awww!

Paco: That’s why I promise you that I’m going to try to match him. And I want to thank him in front of you. I was sent to San Antonio five years ago, and I could never imagine that I would find people like you, who became my friends from the very first moment, and after five years, I know you will always be part of my family. I love you. And well, we’ve been through bad days, very bad days but also through good days, and days that have been far too much, right, Don Lorenzo? Maybe too much. And I repeat, that’s why I love you. The San Antonio precinct will always be alive.

Mariano: Ole!

Paco: Always. To defend the rights and freedom of the Spanish people. And you know why? You want to know why? Simply, “por mis santos cojones”.

Tears and cheers and more tears.

Goyo and Dani hug and kiss.  They are so together.

Pepa kisses the (very short) not-Silvia on the forehead – so sweet in a non-sexual way.

Everyone starts kissing and hugging each other. And we can see some hugging and kissing from the past, which includes Silvia and some PepSi kisses and tender moments.

Yeah, I was crying like Pepa... for what could have been...

Paco walks into his new Captain office, sits on the chair, and tries to get used to the feeling. Somebody knocks at the door and he pretends he’s working on something. It’s DL.

Paco: Come on in.

DL: Sit down. Paco, your men want to show you something.

So then we have the rowing team gag. Translator really, really thinks you all should watch it.

Mariano: Come on, gentlemen! Up! One, two! One, two! One, two! Halt! To the left! Captain Miranda, at your orders!

All: Like a fucking rowing team!

Mariano: Yes, sir! One, two! One, two!

And we have some of the best vintage LHDP funny and slapstick moments: falls, mistakes, drugs, kisses, hits, bitchslaps, songs, dance moves, action.  But most of all, we see Pepa and Silvia, and for that fleeting moment, our throats tighten, our hearts smile, and we remember how almost-perfect it all was.  Because it was, it truly was.

Piper's commentary:

For one last time,

Fuck you Alex Tiny Penis Pina! 

Fuck you for your ginormous ego which made you believe that you could kill 4 characters, especially one who has engendered Silvialogists everywhere, without squandering the fans' goodwill.

Fuck you for assuming that your loyal viewers were somehow so stupid that you could change the entire genre of the show and still assume that they would simply open their mouth and say, "Ah!" to whatever you feed them.

Fuck you for trying to be profound with your pretentious Satanic plot, which Deker explained away in about 5 sentences.  And an extra FU for ripping this Catholic mystery from Dan Brown's Angels and Demons, and the secret organization's allusion to Spain's very own Opus Dei. The Camerlengo in A&D wanted to slow the spread of science and used the Illuminati as a scary diversion.  Senior and his posse wanted to bring people back to Church and used the devil to scare them into attendance.  Either way, both stories were of misguided piety carried out by pitiful men.

Fuck you for the cop-out in explaining the seeming supernatural deeds of Junior: that there were many members worldwide to help him.  Uhm, yeah?  So did those members also manipulate Paco's psyche so he could play chess in his dreams?  And Amadeo just knew how to perfectly impale himself against a wall hook?  And what about Father Sistiaga?  Was he a member of the Witnesses who simply sacrificed himself to lend credence to the story?  And the phone in his legs?  How did it mysteriously get there?  Oh, and Ghost!Silvia? Thank you very much for that by the way, dickhead, but you didn't explain how she appeared to Paco. Was Paco simply stoned?  Where were the bodies of Amadeo and novice?  And Mama Amadeo?  And the Blair Witch house?  Hanging nuns appearing and disappearing?  And Junior in Sara's communion picture?  You didn't close those loops either.

Fuck you for the lazy conclusion of the CNI sub-plot.  I still don't know what its purpose was.  To blackmail Pepa?  To destroy then salvage the Salgado character?  I don't know, but that was just lazy.

Fuck you for not-Silvia's taunted underwhelming appearance. Didn't your press release say that she was going to blow the case wide open?  She didn't utter one fucking word!

Fuck you for imposing Blackman on us, and plastering Amaia all over him.  One goth character was enough, but two? 

Fuck you for the 4 newbies who didn't do much other than to annoy the heck out of us.  And for the characters whom we have learned to love but you have blown up, exiled, shortchanged, or simply sent to TV limbo: Lola, the 4 casualties of Episode 104, Bernarda, Pig Noise guy, Mama Concha, Quoque (Bernarda's son), Lucas... They were good, you know.  They were The DNA of the show.

And lastly, FUCK YOU for killing Silvia.  Yes, Marian wanted to leave the show.  Yes, she was able to display her amazing acting and dying skills. But your smug and unapologetic demeanor afterwards just sealed your dickheadedness, so fuck you.

But THANK YOU as well, for giving us PepSi in the first place.  Really, thank you.

And FUCK YOU for taking it away. 

9x12 LHdP 66.6: The Rip-off - "Sing with Me in the Gasoline Choir"

Ep. 116: Patadón y Parriba

Aside from the movie cliche of having a main character strapped to a bomb and having it tick down to the last possible second without it going off, I didn't spot any blatant rip-offs in this episode. So I've decided to take this opportunity to look at each character based on how they were supposed to be and compare it to how they actually turned out. I haven't seen Ep. 117 yet, so my analysis is limited to everything from pre-S9 articles/interviews to Ep. 116. Also, this lecture is going to be long, PepSi peeps, so please bear with me and thanks in advance for doing so.

Paco Miranda (portrayed by Paco Tous)
Pre-S9 info: Despite being the title character of the series, very little information was divulged about Paco's character prior to the start of S9. A FormulaTV article revealed that evil would come to Earth in the form of a mysterious case involving Satan and that Paco and his hombres would be the only hope in stopping it, while an El Mundo article added that Paco Tous would not be a protagonist.

What actually happened: The articles regarding the story arc for S9 regrettably turned out to be true. As we've seen (at least those of us who have watched S9), Paco and the hombres were slowly sucked further and further into a series of murders that involve Satan and a lot of other things that still don't make sense. Paco personally became obsessed with the case, believing that he is the "Chosen One" who can defeat Satan. Investigation tactics conducted by Paco this season included consulting a priest and his "journey book", a ghost (albeit a beautiful, intelligent one) a tarot reader and a medium, going on an unauthorized mission, and visiting an opium den.

Character analysis: As much as Paco's character stayed true to the rumors, a part of the reason why this season failed so much IMO was b/c Paco began acting in ways that are contrary to who he really is. I've said before that I believe the show's true decline started in S5 and S6 when Lucas and Sara betrayed Paco on the El Kaiser case. I believe the same thing happened this season but the repercussions were more drastic given that S9 had the burden of trying to recover from the death of four characters. With the exception of Mariano and Pove, Paco didn't rely much on any of the other hombres to gather information, and he bought more and more into the belief that he and only he could solve this case. At least when Paco was involved in the El Gordo investigation, he worked on it with the other hombres using (mostly) legitimate police investigation tactics. And perhaps that's what the El Mundo article meant when it said that Paco wouldn't be a protagonist. Perhaps it was saying that Paco's belief that Satan was behind everything made him "the bad guy" b/c he's literally been fighting with everyone, including Mariano, trying to convince them that Satan does exist and is behind all of the deaths. Granted they all came around eventually, but Paco hasn't become any saner or calmer with the support - he keeps getting one step closer to completely falling off the ledge. Finally, Paco's decision to abruptly forgive Salgado for her blackmail of Pepa and her lies goes against Paco's character as the loyal family man, which is a core element of his character and a defining part of the show in general. Thus, I believe that this season failed for two main reasons (three if you count the four deaths from S8): the "66.6" storyline, and Alex Pina & Co.'s decision to their main character into a crazy, unrecognizable shell of the person he once was.

Mariano Moreno (portrayed by Pepón Nieto)
Info pre-S9: Not much information was given about Mariano other than the fact that, like Paco Tous, Pepón Nieto would also not be a protagonist.

What actually happened: Mariano spent the beginning of the season upset at Paco's relationship with Salgado until he realized that their friendship was more important to him. While he's often doubted Paco's belief that Satan is behind all the murders, he's always been there to support his best friend in the investigation.

Character analysis: Mariano has always been one of my least favorite characters. I never liked how he would whine so much and was usually the last holdout amongst the hombres (even among rational Silvia and level-headed Montoya). This season, however, he's been less whiny and more practical. And despite my feelings for Mariano, I've always liked his loyalty to Paco and the friendship they have. He's continued to do a good job IMO of being a true friend to crazy Paco no matter how much he might disagree or not fully believe Paco's theories. He's even resolved his issues regarding Paco and Salgado's relationship, offering his support to both of them when he learns that Salgado blackmailed Pepa and was a part of the CNI's black ops unit. Basically, there have been subtle changes to Mariano's character in a good way this season and I just wish they would've showed more scenes with him and Paco together.

Aitor Carrasco (portrayed by Mario Casas)
Pre-S9 info: The biggest news regarding Aitor in S9 was that he would be involved with both new characters Reyes and Lis. It was stated that he would be in a relationship with Reyes at the beginning of the series but would meet and fall into a relationship with Lis without knowing that they are mother-daughter and be torn between the two women. In an interview with Europa Press, Mario Casas revealed that Aitor enjoys his relationship with Reyes because she makes him feel confident, but having to choose between both women will cause a lot of trouble for Aitor, because he's tired of having a crazy love life and would prefer peace and stability. Other news revealed that he would be assisting Pepa on her "mission" in Italy and become her confidante.

What actually happened: Aitor did indeed travel to Italy and assist Pepa in her mission to kill El Gordo (although he says he didn't realize what he was getting into when he agreed to help). The beginning of S9 also revealed that he's been in a relationship with Reyes for awhile although he doesn't consider it to be exclusive. When he meets Lis, he becomes infatuated with her and sleeps with her before learning that she is Reyes' daughter. Aitor chooses to be with Reyes but struggles with his feelings for both women, eventually deciding that he can't be in a relationship with either and trying to figure out what to do with his life. He also becomes involved in the CNI subplot of the season, helping Pepa and playing a part in "Zebra's" demise.

Character analysis: For someone who's tired of having a crazy love life and would prefer peace and stability, Aitor has taken very little steps to make that happen this season. He may not have known that Reyes and Lis were mother-daughter before he slept with Lis, but once he found out, his subsequent actions/behavior were inexcusable IMO and only served to remind many in the PepSiverse why they disliked him in the first place. Aitor simply had to decide which one he loved more, or, if he couldn't decide, recognize earlier on that he should walk away from both in order to prevent their relationship from deteriorating further. But similarly to when he continued to pursue Sara throughout S8, Aitor thought of no one but himself. Alex Pina & Co. have been trying to get Aitor to fill the void left by Lucas and have been failing horribly since S7. His storyline with Sara alienated many fans who were staunch Lucas-Sara shippers, his one night stand with Pepa alienated the PepSi fans, and I believe the remaining viewers just couldn't get behind the idea that Aitor would be the main cause in ruining yet another relationship. The main thing that separates him from Lucas IMO is that he wasn't doing much of anything else when he wasn't dealing with his love triangle. Yes, he did help Pepa with El Gordo and later with the CNI, but his role in those subplots were small and limited and he was barely involved in the main "66.6" plot. The evolution of Aitor's character is something that Alex Pina & Co. have been failing at for awhile and it has just gotten worse with time.

José Luis Povedilla (portrayed by Carlos Santos)
Pre-S9 info: Previews for S9 revealed Pove sporting a beard and using a cane to help him walk. He also appeared to be more "tough" and angry than the friendly Pove we were used to, indicating that his personality had taken a 180.

What actually happened: Pove started out S9 very different from his original self. He was militant, angry and very hard on the newbies, yelling and threatening them on a normal basis. We eventually learned that Don Lorenzo was encouraging Pove to take a "tough love" approach in his training of the newbies in order to make them more prepared for the field. We also learned that he's been hiding behind his cane as a defense mechanism for the fear he's retained as a result of the events from the S8 finale. Eventually, Pove learns to overcome those fears, helps Paco with the investigation, supports Rita and Curtis' new relationship despite his feelings for Rita, and offers words of comfort to many of the other characters, including Lis.

Character analysis: Pove's character is one of the few who have remained consistent throughout the series. Although he started S9 a bit harder and more crass than we've ever seen him, it was just an act and he soon returned to the old Pove we've come to know and love over the past 5 years. He continued to provide the (sometimes only) comedic relief on the show and his understanding regarding Curtis-Rita's relationship despite his feelings for Rita make you cheer for him and wish he too could find some happiness in life.

Curtis Naranjo (portrayed by Fede Celada)
Pre-S9 info: Aside from the fact that new character Amaia was Curtis' niece and that he would be overprotective of her, there was no news about Curtis prior to the premiere of S9.

What actually happened: Curtis didn't get much screentime, but over time we saw him develop a relationship with Rita, which turned out to be a romantic one. After realizing that he loved Rita, he proposed and the two are planning on getting married in the finale.

Character analysis: I don't know what's up with the cops in San Antonio and their need to have shotgun weddings (minus the bun in the oven). But aside from that, Curtis' character has also remained consistent - when he was on screen, he would provide some comedic relief and showed his continued loyalty to Paco, never questioning Paco's methods or his crazy theories. Alex Pina & Co.'s failure with regard to Curtis lies in their failure to show him grieving from the loss of his best friend Kike. In fact, with the exception of Curtis' toast to the fallen four in Ep. 105, I don't think he ever thought of or mentioned Kike's name ever again. They also failed to show much of Curtis' relationship with his niece Amaia, and they rushed his relationship with Rita and exploring the effects it had on his relationship with Pove. Granted, Alex Pina & Co. only have 13 episodes per season to work with (and probably thought they were going to get a 10th season), but his interactions with Amaia were so few (and undeveloped) that they would've been better off IMO if they didn't make them related to each other.

Rita Peláez (portrayed by Neus Sanz)
Pre-S9 info: Just as Rita wasn't in the helicopter and was barely in any of the S9 previews, there was no news with regard to her character at all prior to the start of S9.

What actually happened: Like Curtis, Rita wasn't on screen much during S9. She spent her time occasionally helping out Paco on the "66.6" investigation and the rest developing her relationship with Curtis culminating in their engagement and upcoming wedding in the finale.

Character analysis: If I had to bet, I would wager that of all the characters Rita had the least amount of screentime. IMO Alex Pina & Co.'s main failure with regard to Rita (aside from not allowing her to fulfill her dream of becoming an undercover prostitute) was that they neglected to show her dealing with the loss of Montoya. Similar to Curtis, Rita never mentioned Montoya or the sadness she may be experiencing as a result of that loss. Given that both she and Curtis lost a dear friend/love interest, it makes sense on some level that they might connect and bond as a result of those losses, but as I stated above, their romance was rushed and suffered from several flaws.

Pepa Miranda (portrayed by Laura Sánchez)
Pre-S9 info: Several interviews with Laura Sánchez, including one from FormulaTV revealed that in S9 Pepa would be obsessed and crazy with revenge for Silvia's death and have a love-hate relationship with her sister-in-law (Salgado). LS also revealed that Pepa would be living with Paco in Sara's old room, that Aitor would become Pepa's confidante, that she would maintain a professional relationship with new forensics inspector Deker, and that she would not fall in love again this season. A Supertele article revealed that Pepa and Aitor would be in Italy, which lent credence to the rumors that she would obsessed with vengeance.

What actually happened: Pepa was indeed crazy and vengeful, but only at the beginning of S9. With Aitor's help, she executed El Gordo and was later blackmailed by Salgado and the CNI, which created a great deal of tension between the two women. And while Pepa may not be in love with him, she did have a one night stand with Deker and seems to have developed as least a friendship with him. She confessed to both Paco and Don Lorenzo that she killed El Gordo and later offered her support to Paco when he revealed that despite Salagdo's actions, he loved her and wanted to marry her.

Character analysis: The evolution (or regression depending on your point of view) of Pepa's character has been discussed at great lengths by many in the PepSiverse this season. We haven't seen her grieving over Silvia much, nor has she mentioned Silvia often this entire season, and the PepSiverse has mixed feelings about what this means for Pepa's character which I'm not going to discuss any further here. What I will talk about is the other way that Alex Pina & Co. failed with regard to Pepa's character: their failure to explore her relationships with Don Lorenzo and Paco. All three suffered from the same loss - a family member - but at no time were they shown helping each other through their grief (perhaps that scene in Ep. 107 but that's it). Pepa's random confession in murdering El Gordo was a big revelation and yet, it was dismissed just like many of the other plot points this season. Instead, they alluded to a discussion, Pepa disappeared for awhile, returned, and they acted like nothing happened. To top it all off, they placed her in a fantastic B storyline with Salgado and the CNI but concluded it without any involvement from Pepa even though it started and continued to exist because of consequences relating to her actions.

Lis Peñuelas (portrayed by Patricia Montero)

Pre-S9 info: Lis was introduced as a new rookie in the precinct, as well as the daughter of Reyes and the love interest of both Aitor and Dani. She was described as an independent, intelligent, confident and determined young woman who can take down armed and dangerous criminals or jump across rooftops while in pursuit of a fugitive.

What actually happened: The first time the audience was introduced to Lis, she was playing dead in a training simulation. Since then, her role with regard to actual police work has been very limited. She occasionally participated in the "66.6" investigation but most of her scenes centered around her developing interest and love for Aitor. Even after Lis learned that he was her mother's mysterious lover, she continued to pursue him and it created a rift in her relationship with Reyes.

Character analysis: Lis is this season's greatest failure IMO. She hasn't displayed any of the traits listed in her character description. Instead of appearing independent, intelligent and confident, she's come off as self-centered, ignorant and slightly stalkerish. Additionally, I highly doubt she could take down an armed criminal or chase a fugitive across a rooftop - she doesn't even know how to drive. No, Lis' idea of police work consists of eating while on a stakeout, freaking out and screaming while on unauthorized missions, getting high, and falling asleep on the job. If there was any new character that Alex Pina & Co. should not have created, it should've been Lis.

Daniel Andradas (portrayed by Mark Gracia)

Pre-S9 info: Dani was introduced as another new rookie in the precinct. He was described as someone that people like from the start because of his charm, but behind that charm lies a guy who is rebellious and daring. The biggest news regarding Dani (aside from his interest in Lis) was that he would be butting heads with his training instructor Pove.

What happened to him: Dani started out butting heads with Pove, because he felt Pove was being too hard on him and the other rookies. He spent the beginning of the season finding ways to embarrass Pove in retaliation for the way he was being treated, until he got shot during an investigation. Following his recovery, Dani's screentime became more limited as he focused more on his infatuation with Lis and his disapproval of her desire to be in a relationship with Aitor.

Character analysis: While Dani certainly has been rebellious and, I suppose, daring at times, he certainly has not been charming IMO. As with many other characters, his storylines have remain limited and underdeveloped. We know that he loves Lis and he has talked to her about her actions with regard to her mother and Reyes, but most of Dani's screentime involves him scowling and being emo. Alex Pina & Co. failed with regard to this character mainly b/c they failed to develop him in any substantial way - a decent cop, a good friend, a valid rival for Aitor, etc.

Amaia Mondragón (portrayed by Ángela Cremonte)

Pre-S9 info: Amaia was also introduced as a new rookie in the precinct as well as Curtis' niece. She was described as an empathetic character who always looks for the good in others and dresses in clothes that others wouldn't dare to wear. It was also rumored that Amaia would fall in love with the mysterious Blackman, much to the dismay of both her uncle Curtis and her friend (and admirer) Goyo.

What actually happened: Amaia did the occasional police work until she met Blackman and instantly connected with the mysterious vigilante. She became consumed with her love for him and could literally "sense" his presence in the precinct. Amaia was accidentally shot when Blackman intervened to save Salgado's life. Since then, she's been trying to assuage Blackman's fears and pursue a relationship with him.

Character analysis: Amaia started off as one of the likeable newbies of the season. Her quirky attitude was refreshing compared to Lis' self-centeredness and Dani's arrogance. However, once her storyline with Blackman began, Amaia delved into a bumbling mess of a character who could not stop thinking about him. IMO her love story failed b/c it was too over-the-top. Their scenes were too forced and too cheesy. It didn't help that Alex Pina & Co. chose to have her in a relationship with Blackman - a non-regular - in the first place. And similar to the Rita-Curtis relationship, the Amaia-Blackman relationship has been rushed. They met in Ep. 108, but didn't see each other again until Ep. 114, giving Alex Pina & Co. only three episodes to develop (and hopefully provide a resolution to) their romance.

Goyo (portrayed by Álex Hernández)

Pre-S9 info: Goyo was introduced as the fourth rookie of the group. He was described as a guy who has been unlucky in life and suffers from paranoia but is very loyal to his friends and will often be the first to offer his help. He's also in love with Amaia and has been since their days at the police academy.

What actually happened: Goyo has had the unfortunate luck of not doing much work this season. After talking with Rita, he finally worked up the courage to confess his feelings to Amaia before learning that she was in love with Blackman. Still, Goyo showed himself to be a good guy by trying to remain friends with her despite his feelings. He eventually admitted his feelings to Amaia (while under the influence) and even though she did not reciprocate, he has continued to support her, even going so far to unintentionally create panic at the precinct when he send out a signal for Blackman that got misinterpreted by the rest of the police.

Character analysis: Goyo is one of the few newbies has accurately matched his character description. And even though he seems like a push over (and often is pushed around by others), he remains a true friend, and has shown that he isn't afraid to stand up for himself (as he did when he told both Dani and Blackman off). My only problem with Goyo is that he is truly a poor-man's version of Pove - the guy with a good heart but the worst luck. While Alex Pina & Co. may not have had the opportunity to assassinate Goyo's character, they also didn't have the time (or chose not) to utilize him in an effective way on the show.

Deker (portrayed by Benjamín Vicuña)

Pre-S9 info: Deker was introduced as the new forensics inspector and described as a person with a sarcastic and irreverent attitude. Further news stated that Deker was previously married but his marriage didn't work out (but the articles didn't say why) and, as a result, he's become a womanizer.

What actually happened: Deker started off S9 making an enemy in Don Lorenzo (and the PepSi fans) by cleaning out Silvia's lab and making crude statements about his deceased predecessor. His unorthodox methods became routine, as he would listen to rock music and eat while working and talk to his victims. Deker's one night stand with Pepa developed into something more on his part, and we learned that he previously came off as cold and crass b/c he was masking his pain over the death of his wife and daughter. Since that revelation, Deker has been determined not to live that way again, and has his sights set on Pepa even though he knows she's a lesbian.

Character analysis: As I've stated before, the biggest failure with regard to Deker is that Alex Pina & Co. took too long in revealing his backstory that, by the time they did, (most of) the audience no longer cared. Viewers found his actions and attitude leading up to that revelation unforgivable and for many, Deker reached the point of no return when he slept with Pepa and continued to express his interest in her afterward. Personally, I think if one looks at Deker from a strictly professional point of view, his character was a success. His methods may have been unorthodox, but he is an intelligent and competent forensics inspector and has been able to gather legitimate evidence to support Paco's crazy theories, lending credence (sadly) to the "66.6" storyline. However, from a personal point of view, Deker is an absolute failure IMO for the reasons I've already stated simply b/c of his crass attitude and Alex Pina & Co.'s decision to wait until halfway through the season to start explaining and exploring his backstory.

Reyes Sánchez Bilbao (portrayed by Goya Toledo)
Pre-S9 info: Reyes was introduced as Montoya's replacement in the precinct, the mother of rookie Lis and described as a competent and successful woman on the surface, but a sensitive, neurotic and insecure woman underneath. Further news stated that she would be keeping their relationship a secret from others in the precinct and that she would have several ideas to improve and modernize the precinct, but would butt heads with Don Lorenzo as a result. The biggest news regarding Reyes is that she would be involved in an affair with Aitor, and that she would later learn that he would become involved with another woman closer to his age, although she doesn't realize that woman is her daughter, Lis.

What actually happened: Reyes began S9 in a secret relationship with Aitor and also deciding to keep the fact that she is Lis' mother a secret. She is devastated when she discovers that Aitor is the man Lis is in love with and that they slept together, but continues to date him anyway. Her revelation to Lis that she and Aitor are in a relationship severely damages her relationship with Lis, and they have yet to recover from it. On a professional level, Reyes initially butted heads with Don Lorenzo over changing the way things are done at the precinct, but they have since come to an understanding with each other. She is one of the only people in the precinct who vehemently disapproves of Paco's investigation tactics, openly stating and recognizing that they need to gather legitimate evidence that has been discovered through a legitimate police investigation.

Character analysis: Similar to Deker, Reyes' character actually succeeds on a professional level but fails on a personal level. Her decision to remain in a relationship with Aitor despite Lis' feelings for him is as bad as Sara's betrayal of Paco during the El Kaiser case IMO - sacrificing a family member for a love interest. It might even be worse simply b/c Reyes is the mother and should care more about her child than her misguided libido. Reyes' scenes are always weaker when they involve her love triangle with Aitor and Lis, not b/c Goyo Toledo is a bad actress, but b/c those scenes make Reyes herself look weak. In contrast, her scenes tend to be strong when they involve her acting in a professional capacity - she's more focused, determined, intelligent and independent. Thus, Alex Pina & Co. failed with regard to Reyes' character b/c they chose to focus on things that would make her character seem more weak than strong - a waste of Goyo Toledo's talents.

Don Lorenzo Castro (portrayed by Juan Diego)
Pre-S9 info: The FormulaTV article listed Juan Diego as the fourth actor (along with Paco, Pepón and Mario) who would not be a protagonist. Additionally other news revealed that Don Lorenzo would be butting heads with Reyes, whom he believes has been brought in to force him into early retirement.

What actually happened: Don Lorenzo began the season butting heads with Reyes as the rumors predicted. He also disliked Deker, but eventually came to an understanding with both characters. Don Lorenzo has struggled a lot with the "66.6" investigation, finding it hard to believe Paco's theory that Satan is the killer and that Paco is the "Chosen One". Recently, Don Lorenzo considered retiring before changing his mind and deciding to stick with Paco and the other hombres.

Character analysis: Like Pove, Don Lorenzo's character has continued to remain consistent. One of the things that makes DL so likeable is that he may be a tough old man who is verbally abusive and retains a lot of his old school habits, but he genuinely cares for each officer in his precinct and has shown his willingness to change (as he did when he learned to accept and respect Silvia's relationship with Pepa). I think the only failure with regard to DL's character is that his recently formed father-daughter relationship with Pepa was never explored or developed, which was a wasted opportunity for both characters. Nevertheless, at least DL didn't suffer from character assassination like so many others. Then again, I like to believe he was spared b/c Alex Pina & Co. were afraid that Juan Diego might channel DL and kick their santos cojones if they did mess with his character.

Marina Salgado (portrayed by Cristina Plazas)
Pre-S9 info: No new information was specifically released regarding Salgado's character. However, cast photos and revelations from Laura Sánchez's interview indicated that while Paco and Salgado were still together Pepa would be having a love-hate relationship with her.

What actually happened: The beginning of S9 revealed that Paco and Salgado were in a committed relationship and had been living together for some time. When El Gordo turns up dead, Salgado is tasked with blackmailing Pepa into working for the CNI. It is something that she struggles with b/c of her love for Paco and eventually, she confesses to Don Lorenzo and Mariano that she works for a black ops unit of the CNI know as "Zebra". In an effort to protect her, Blackman shoots Salgado. When Paco learns about her participation in "Zebra" and her role in blackmailing Pepa, he dumps her only to realize that he still loves her, so he proposes to Salgado, who gladly accepts.

Character analysis: In S9, Salgado continued to suffer from the same character flaw that's hindered her since she was first introduced in S6: she tends to change from a strong, intelligent woman into a passive, weak one whenever she's involved in a relationship. Similar to Reyes, she often excels in her professional life, but her personal one often tends to be a complete disaster. Despite the fact that she betrayed Paco's trust, as I've written before, I have actually enjoyed Cristina Plazas' work with regard to the CNI storyline this season and think she did a great job of portraying a woman torn between her love for Paco and her fear of the repercussions for disobeying the CNI. Even though she acted late in doing the right thing professionally (which negatively affected her relationship personally) I think she's the only character to actually find redemption this season. She allowed herself to realize that she could not continue to participate with "Zebra" and be in a relationship with Paco so she was willing to give up one knowing it could end up costing her both things.

Blackman (portrayed by Asier Etxeandia)
Pre-S9 info: Like Salgado, no information was released prior to the premiere regarding Blackman, with the exception that Amaia would fall in love with him.

What actually happened: Blackman initially appeared in S9 without any memory of who he was. While he was at the precinct looking for answers, he met Amaia and instantly connected with her, but left abruptly after he regained his memory. Blackman recently returned to shoot Salgado in a warped effort to save her from the CNI and help expose "Zebra", and viewers learned that while Blackman has a history of being extremely lucky, his loved ones tend to suffer and die. Thus, Blackman initially rebuffs Amaia's advances in an attempt to protect her, but she gets injured anyway, which is when Blackman begins to realize that he can't hide his feelings for her anymore.

Character analysis: I've always said that Blackman does a good job of coming off as a very cool character. However, that doesn't change the fact that Blackman never should have been on this show to begin with b/c his supernatural abilities don't fit into the show's DNA. With regard to this season, Blackman's role has been sporadic - Alex Pina & Co. continue to randomly inject him into current subplots or irrelevant new subplots that serve no purpose to the main story arc. And as I stated earlier, his romance storyline with Amaia is too over-the-top to be endearing or entertaining and his emo attitude simply got old.

Viewers have been understandably upset and reacted negatively to Alex Pina's decision to turn S9 into a paranormal thriller, but perhaps the true nail in the coffin for the show has been the audiences' disdain over the numerous character assassinations that have occurred this season as well as the injection of several new, undeveloped, uninteresting characters that only served to steal screentime from the veteran cast members without adding too much to the storylines or the premise of the show. I suppose the best we can hope for at this point is that each character will find some sort of resolution in the series finale. It'll be an added bonus if each character (especially the original cast) can receive a decent resolution. Like I said, one can hope.

kalike

*The title for this lecture is based on lyrics from the song "Bomb" by Bush.